contreceptionist

The absolute opposite of a hot receptionist/secretary.

A secretary so unappealing that not only would you never dare consider risking your job for sexual relations with her, but you're completely put off the entire female gender every time you pass her desk.

The fantasy Jim had been having involving Angelina Jolie, a desert island and a sack of viagra was completely nullified when he walked past his contreceptionist's desk.

FleshPretzel

1. An intertwining of 2 or more naked bodies.

2. A naked pose that only an incredibly flexible female gymnast can sustain.

1. Upon returning from fetching a drink in the kitchen I discovered three fine females entwined in a FleshPretzel on my bed....AWESOME!

2. See that thing she's doing with her legs behind her ears? That's a FleshPretzel...uh huh!

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compenisation

When someone does something/buys something/acts in a certain way in order to compensate for a small penis.

Guy A: See that short balding guy with the Ferrari? Yeah, I bet he's compensating for something...

Guy B: That's a great example of compenisation right there.

textslap

A non-verbal chiding or tirade usually delivered via email or sms, often used to re-invigorate or re-align the recipient.

Bobby has not been pulling his weight recently so as his boss I sent him a textslap via company email.

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Diebrid

A combination of "diesel" and "hybrid"; referring to an upcoming trend amongst fuel-economy obsessed auto manufacturers of creating hybrid diesel / electric drivetrains.

Both technologies are not known for their exciting driving characteristics, so essentially a diesel / electric hybrid is where traditional (petrol-driven) performance motoring goes to die.

Man, if they continue developing diebrids they'll take all the joy out of motoring... it's enough to make any petrolhead sick to the stomach.

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poop snooker

Anal sex.

Not to be confused with poop snookered

Hey baby, you down for some poop snooker tonight?

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whoredition

An audition for a role in a film/play/band that is not based on the quality of actual performance, but rather on the quality of sexual favors provided to secure said role.

Jamie's such a hottie that we allowed her to whoredition for the band, even though everyone knows she can't sing to save her soul.

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