contreceptionist

The absolute opposite of a hot receptionist/secretary.

A secretary so unappealing that not only would you never dare consider risking your job for sexual relations with her, but you're completely put off the entire female gender every time you pass her desk.

The fantasy Jim had been having involving Angelina Jolie, a desert island and a sack of viagra was completely nullified when he walked past his contreceptionist's desk.