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Blumpkin: Red Beard of Courage

Doing a sitting 69 with a girl on her period while you're taking a dump.

Last night to celebrate our anniversary, my girlfriend and I did a Blumpkin: Red Beard of Courage in her parents bathroom.

by Chillosophy October 4, 2017


Dutch Lantern

When you are laying in bed with someone and push their head under the sheets while flatulating. Then, while holding the sheets down to contain the fumes, you light a match or lighter under the sheet with your free hand igniting a mesmerizing flame that will likely burn the person inside.

“My girlfriend gave me the Dutch Lantern last weekend, so I spent most of Saturday night in the ER and will no eyebrows for weeks”

by Chillosophy August 6, 2018


Trumpkin

A Trumpkin is simply a blumpkin, but on a golden toilet (like the one ex President Donald Trump supposedly owns) Bonus points if you powder your balls with Cheeto dust beforehand.

“The president elect celebrated his victory quietly in his home, receiving a victory Trumpkin”

by Chillosophy March 31, 2021


Jell-do

A dildo made of Jell-o.

My girlfriend wanted a Jell-do for her birthday, so I made her one last night

by Chillosophy August 7, 2017


Grape Stomper

A technique used to push feces through a drain grate, usually in a shower. When you accidentally defecate in the shower and you stomp the feces through the drain with a powerful thrust of your foot. Thus removing evidence of this humiliating mistake.

I shit in my mother-in-laws shower last night and had to pull a Grape Stomper.

by Chillosophy September 14, 2018