Gooch Bugs

The stubborn parasitical like organisms which hatch from the clustered gooch eggs between ones anus and goolies.

They often migrate to the utopian weaves of a Muslim's prayer matt via the shedding of ball broth and sack syrup of a heavily sweating and unwholesome Muz.

'As Maqsood unrolled his best but tattered and decaying prayer matt, he was dehumanised and robbed of his senses by the fogging blizzard of gooch bugs. Hatched, unhatched and deceased'.

Grooming Jam

The inaugral shedding of coose claret after a degenerate nonce has entered his victim for the first time.

When the police searched his bedroom, they found remnants of semen and grooming jam on his bespattered y-fronts and all 4 walls of the room.

Faggotrix

The shit stabbing theatrical companion who often associates with rancid, loud and graceless tarts.

‘As promised, Mrs Lawreson’s favourite faggotrix Crispin accompanied her to the salon to get her corpulent gammon hangers waxed before they hit the town for cocktails.’

‘A mid seizure Crispin gagged and minced as the suicidal squad of therapist gathered the stifling quantity of detritus from her freshly scythed twathole. But as a loyal faggotrix, said nothing regarding her dripping mess of a yawning stubbly clump, which no man nor beast would dare present his bell towards.’

Clump Sporran

Burly chicks.

The suety drapes shrouding the fetid seafood platter of a gargantuan and stout female.

I spent a fruitless bank holiday creaming my wives clump sporran with factor 50 sun block. To no avail.

Pakteria

A scourge of genetic organismns which thrive on it's host.

Microscopic yet with an ungodly odour, they are found exclusively on the oily hide of a subcontinental being. Simply neutralised with any common soap.

A battalion of British rifleman have turned their weapons on themselves in the face of a murderous pong fog of Pakteria.

Choc-clit

Zone of arousal.

Believed to be located way up the batty pipe of all practitioners of the appaling pastime of shit-stabbing poovery.

‘After receiving his Olympic gold medal. Daley Tom’s choc-clit also received a tickle from his husband’s shit streaked prick. ‘Before being fisted beyond function’

Boonspan

The wingspan of your average black being.

Despite weeks of meticulous planning for Black Friday, a hapless Marquavias was seduced by a flat screen tv so large that it even exceeded his vast boonspan.

His greed and lust for crime, left him empty handed as he was caught red handed with incompatible surround stink speakers’.