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Clam sander

One who sands clams. Usually attains the title through their occupation. Someone who specialises in genetalia styling is a clam sander. But this can mean someone who literally seeks out clams and sands them in an uknown fashion.

Gandalf: "Have you seen Bilbo recently?"
Frodo: "Oh yeah, every day he's out on the beach looking for clams."
Gandalf: "Whyever so?"
Frodo: "He likes to sand them."
Gandalf: "Fool."

Tobias: "Wow, Mangus where'd you get your clams styled?"
Magnus: "Don't be patheic, Tobias. They always look like this."

Lillith: "Hey Celeste, I can't seem to find a good clam sander. Do you know anyone good?
Celeste: "Yeah, I go to Kevin."

by Lentonius May 26, 2012

2👍 2👎


Jam bagger

One that bags jam. Usually an occupation which requires one to pour jam onto a table, or such a surface, then proceeds to 'swipe' the jam off the edge of the surface, into a sack or bag. But can be a hobby or activity one enjoys, jam baggers usually have a jam 'fetish' and will go out of their way find any and all jam they can.

Can also be used as an offensive term for it creates the image of a strange and peculiar character.

Tobias had been promoted to a jam bagger after working 7 years as a clam sander.

Magnus: "My family are dead and I have no job, please can you spare some change?"
Angus: "Woah! No way. Get over yourself, jam bagger."
Magnus: "Respect me, for my name is MAGNUS!"
Angus: "Take all my money."

by Lentonius May 26, 2012

2👍 2👎