Victoria Regina

Queen Victoria. Pronounced like "China".

Queen Victoria had crotchless bloomers with "VR" embroidered, which stands for "Victoria Regina".

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shimmer

A floor wax. Outlasts every other leading floor wax, 2 to 1. It's durable, and it's scuff-resistant.

Wife: New Shimmer is a floor wax!

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shimmer

a dessert topping. it's delicious! Perks up anything from an ice cream sundae to a pumpkin pie!

Husband: No, new Shimmer is a dessert topping!

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k

okay

McConnell: U mislead ne investors?
Blankfein: Nope.
Mc: k

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on vot theory?

WTF!

Bullshit!

A Washington Redskins cornerback prevents a Dallas touchdown, but is called for pass interference.

William Safire: "Bad call!"

Chief Justice Earl Warren: "Poor judgment."

National Security Adviser Henry Kissinger: "On vot theory?"

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recession

Two successive quarterly declines in GDP

Ronald Reagan: Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours. And recovery is when Jimmy Carter loses his.

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Huma Weiner

Wife of New York Congressman Anthony Weiner

Imus: Anthony Weiner married Huma Abedin. Now she's Huma Weiner.
All: ha ha ha ha
Imus: What?
Rob: You said "Huma Weiner". ha ha ha ha
Imus: What's wrong with that?
Rob: Huma Weiner? get it? Huma Weiner? ha ha ha ha

Imus: What?

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