Mastercation

Due to intense lack of funds, a mastercation is a "staycation" wherein the only planned activity for amusement is masturbation. Should only be attempted by the truly pathetic.

I signed up for Naughty America for three days for $1.95, so I think I'm going to take Monday off and have myself a little mastercation.

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crapwreck

A situation that goes from bad to worse quickly, often with bitterly funny results.

The Mets were already losing 15-0 when it started raining. They cancelled the game, my hot dog got wet, and a fat person stepped on my toes on the train ride home. What a crapwreck.

Filthy Friday

Not showering on Friday morning (or Thursday night) due to laziness brought on by excessive alcohol consumption. Such an action leaves one smelling less-than-perfect all day long on Friday, necessitating an all-too-brief wash-down after work or school before the nightly cycle of drinking begins anew.

I was going to meet Becky right after work, but I had some Filthy Friday action going on, and didn't want to meet her wearing the same outfit as last night.

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