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The satanic church was started in the 60's by Anton LaVey, so logic would follow that he would be able to define a satanist better than Oprah or whoever hosts Dateline or 20/20. A satanist doesn't believe in god or satan. A satanist is an atheist that believes people should be responsible for their actions.
Satanism itself addresses problems it finds with Judeo-Christian beliefs. They find that telling one's children that they should behave correctly not because its the decent thing to do but because some ridiculous land of fire will make their 'afterlife' really shitty is poor parenting.
The reason why satanists are thought of as scary people in black coats that sacrifice goats and abduct children springs from 2 sources. The first is sensationalist media outlets like Oprah and Dateline and 20/20 and all the daytime talk shows.
The second is the real reason why people believe these shows and thats the tendency of Christians to need to find evil where it doesn't exist. Christians themselves tend to be egotistical (because they only follow their faith when convenient) and like to feel more pious and self-righteous by creating an evil boogeyman that doesn't exist so they can blame society's decay on them.
Christian douchebag: Yeah so this little kid has gone missing, its gotta be the Satanists.
Non-idiot: Hmm, or it could be just a regular criminal.
Christian douchebag: No! Satanists ruin everything. Satanists make me ignore my faith by beating the hell out of my wife and sleeping with my secretary! Its okay though, as long as I go to church a lot and tell god I'm sorry for beating up my wife I'm good. Loopholes are great.
1080π 623π
One of the many examples of why any band that feels they need to define themselves in terms of "Christian genre here" do so because they suck and can't make it being defined by their genre without the Christian tag on it. This is not to bash Christians, but to bash Norma Jean, who indeed suck.
Billy: Hey man have you ever heard Norma Jean?
Joey: No, I haven't how are they?
Billy: Well they really aren't very good actually.
Joey: Well then why the hell should I listen to them? What kinda music are they?
Billy: They are Christian Hardcore
Joey: OHHH, ok I'll go buy their CDs. I prefer my bands to have a positive Christian message to them, regardless of their lack of talent
Billy: Yeah me too. Plus they have really neato tshirts. Yay for Jesus!
40π 110π
Derived from the popular pearl necklace in which a man ejaculates on a woman's neck, a pearl moustache consists of a man depositing semen on a woman's upper lip, creating a pearly-white moustache of sorts.
This act requires a deft control of one's wang in order to not just perform your average facial. Only the most talented of wangsmen have mastered the pearl moustache.
Inexperienced wangsman: Yeah so I attempted a pearl moustache last night on Tayfondah and I couldn't move fast enough. What a mess it was!
Experienced wangsman: n00b...
61π 23π
Superfippy is a contraction of 'superficial hippie'. This term is used to describe a certain breed of animal-rights advocates. Though protesting for animal rights is an honorable endeavor, superfippies only care about animals they think are cute. They don't protest animal testing or the destruction of habitat for moral reasons or because of the impact these things have on the environment. Superfippies only care about the safety of cute/fuzzy animals that they like. Some of these animals include dolphins, bunnies and chimps.
Mike: Moonspray is such a superfippy. She is always bitching about non-dolphin safe tuna because she doesn't want dolphins being killed for food. All I can say is it sucks for the tuna that they arent fuzzy or adoreable.
3π 5π
Hr0nz is a word to describe an excited sexual state. This word is a derivative of pr0n, but doesn't necessarily have to pertain to pornography. Hr0nz can be used to describe somebody who has just seen someone that he/she felt was attractive, or simply somebody who is just sexually aroused for no damn reason whatsoever.
person A: Did you see that girl's ass the other day. God bless those jeans without the back pockets.
person B: Yeah I noticed, you were like "oMZgz I haev tEH hr0nzzzwtfstfuhaxbbq!!eleven"
3π 2π
A Cum Trough is a word (albeit a crude one) that describes the indentation found in the mid back area of a woman. Its usually a line that runs down the length of the spine (disappears at the lower back) and is sunken in more than either side of the woman's back. Usually it isn't found in really thin women (usually you just see their actual spine) nor heavyset women (whose backs are usually just doughey and flat). Most men, consciously or not, find this part of the body sexy.
The reason this area is called a Cum Trough is because when engaging in doggy style sex or a facsimile thereof, the man may be so inclined to pull out of the woman and ejaculate on her mid back. Rather than just leaking every which way, the Cum Trough acts as a trench or trough of sorts and causes all the semen to stay in a neat straight line on the woman's back, presumably until she stands up/rolls to either side.
Joe: Yeah dude, my girl is great. Oh and to top it all off, she has a nice little Cum Trough that I got to try out last night.
Bob: Yeah you're lucky, I keep going out with these damn skinny women, they have nothing but spine. Where is a man to deposit his seed, I ask you!
Joe: Face?
Bob: Oh yeah... I'll get back to you on that.
29π 10π
A carbo-dook is a contraction of 'carbonated dookie'. This can be seen when one takes a massive dump and for some reason said dookie has small bubbles coming off of it in the water.
Scientists have pondered as to why this happens for centuries. Some scientists suggest it is because of an excess of carbonated beverages in one's diet, whereas other scientists say those scientists are totally gay.
Bob:Yeah so Bill's mom was being a total shig to me the other day?
Tom:junx! What did you do, dude?
Bob:Well I left her a carbo-dook in her washing machine and then I broke!
Tom:SHEIIIIIIIIT
6π 6π