dad jeans

Any pair of men's jeans that are not *skin fucking tight*, which makes getting into and out of them feel less like rubber gloves, and more like clothing. Regular (non- dad jeans) tend to accentuate the bulge and cause chafing.

My balls are chafed. I need some dad jeans.

20👍 12👎

Douche and a half

Someone who exceeds the limits of being a normal douche, a douchebag, or even a douche canoe. 1 douche and a half = 50 douche canoes. Inspired by the M35 2-1/2 ton military cargo truck ("deuce and a half").

person 1: What's with the parade of douche and a halfs?
person 2: They want to make America great again.
person 1: Great for Putin?
person 2: Yeah, pretty much...and for late-night TV hosts.

18👍 2👎