PEFOS

Short for Pre-excretory Faecal Odour Syndrome, PEFOS is a form of flatulence, typically passed just before a bowel movement. It produces a particularly offensive odour, due to the proximity of the descending stool and the air pocket soon to be expelled as wind.

Please note: PEFOS is a parody “syndrome”, not recognised by the National Institute of Clinical Excellence.

Karen: “I tell you what, earlier I went for a number two, and as I stooped down, I farted and it went right in my face and nearly knocked me out”

Becky: “That’s PEFOS for you.”

Karen: “Pee-what?”

Becky: “PEFOS. It’s short for Pre-excretory Faecal Odour Syndrome. Basically, it’s a really deadly fart that pops out just before you poop.”

Karen: “Ew. I always wondered why those types of fart smell so bad.”

Gayus ex Machina

In works of fiction; the use/revelation of a character’s sexuality to advance the plot. Similar to Deus ex Machina, but gayer.

Girl 1: “Omg, Madonna was literally dying till she realised she was actually in love with Shakira, then she got up and started dancing! That’s the power of love for you.”

Girl 2: “No, that’s the power of Gayus ex Machina and bad storytelling.”

beak it

An imperative, to call one or more persons to silence, especially when said person/s are generally just talking shit. Popular in the north of England.

"Look mate, I know you have a valid opinion, but just beak it, will you?"