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Masturbating After Touching Titties.
or
Masturbating After Touching Testicles.
Fundita: Fundo saw Matt at the strip club.
Fundala: Which strip club?
Fundita: I never asked his preference.
When you crack your fortune cookie open, the fortune crookie takes your fortune and reads it first, so as to make the fortune theirs. Similar to the hamburglar, only with fortune cookies.
Legend has it that the first person to read the fortune, after the cookie has been opened, will own that fortune, unless the fortune is read aloud, by which the fortune becomes no longer valid.
When Fundo cracked his fortune cookie open, the fortune crookie ran past and grabbed the fortune out of the cookie before Fundo had a chance to read it.
A 12 incher is a school ruler. Not the principal, but the superintendent.
Fundo's girlfriend visited the 12 incher to get a better grade, and ended up choking in tears.
Glorg: What the hell is that on your foot?! A third toe?!
Slorg: It's my toe nub.
Glorg: What the hell!?!
A bounty hunter is someone who wants to be a cop, but wasn't good enough to become one. As a result, they become stalker snitches.
As a bounty hunter, Fundo followed his sister around until he thought it was time to call police. What a stalker snitch.
Looking under skirts, or down shirts to get a peak of a naughty part.
While on the escalator, Fundo used his camera phone to get a photographic sneak peak under the skirt of the female standing 3 steps ahead of him. Fortunately for him, she wasn't wearing panties.
UnderCover Clueless Cokehead. A nickname for the person obviously sniffing lines, but clueless to the fact that people already know about the habit. Usually a cool as hell person until the stereotypes pertaining to cokeheads emerge.
Fundo figured out his wife was UCCC material when he stood by the bathroom door and listened to her sniff lines, and watched her nonchalantly walk out. Fundo didn't care because he knew his wife graduated with honors.