false wetness

the usage of a sexual lubricant. specifically, using a lubricant without your partner's knowledge is "bearing false wetness."

"man, i thought my girlfriend was really ready for me last night, but later when i snuck into her purse i found out she was bearing false wetness. isn't that a sin?"

ohmigod variant

how valley girls refer to the omicron covid variant.

“hey suzy, did you hear about the new ohmigod variant? it’s - like - sooooo contagious.”

waiftress

the underweight, pasty, young urchin serving you in a bar. typically with doc marten boots, no makeup and stringy hair.

hopefully the draft in the bar won't blow our waiftress away before she brings me another beer.

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mater

the name for a significant other who is a dedicated partner, but where no marriage has taken place. indicative of a much stronger relationship than simply "boyfriend" or "girlfriend."

i'd like to introduce my mater, sheri.

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phonejam

the combination of earwax, sweat and dirt that builds up around the edges and in the depressions of your mobile phone or its case.

man, I haven't cleaned my case in months, it's almost black with phonejam.

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