infantilize

verb trans.

to treat someone as a child or in a way that denies their maturity

jimmy infantilizes his friends all the time

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paid programming

what is on when youve accidently fallen asleep in front of the tv, or when your too lazy to turn off the tv because your on the internet.
also known as infomercials

john: agh tv woke me up in the middle of the night, paid programming was on
bill: hm interesting.. you know insomniacs use to watch paid programming before the internet was born.

matt: omg i seriously had the craziest dream last night
zack: yea what happened
matt: billy mays was convincing me to buy OxiClean

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mater

informal; brit. Mother

oh no butter scones for me mater, im off to fly the grand piano

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ashtray

a name that best friends, jeny and kimberley, used to call a girl in 5th grade. they are now seniors in high school and the name is still very funny.

jeny (in arizona): hey kimberley guess what? i saw ashtray today!!

kimberley (in new zealand): haha no way! after all these years?! wow

jeny: yea haha we have some real good memories from back in the day.

kimberley: yup priceless

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blahzerz

one of the best words to use when u have nothing else to say or u want to avoid talking to someone; its just wow.. an undescribable word -er wait i think i just described it to ya.. oh blahzerz.

1.
some guy: soo i have nothing else to say right now..

some girl: oh yea? ur suppose to say blahzerz u moron, read the definition!

2.
skanky girl: so anyways he asked me out and i told him that i might have genital herp-

jeny: BLAHZERZ!

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humanize

making something more civilized; humane

"i tried to help the children but they tore my arm off!!!!"

"the opposite of humanize is dehumanize"

"wtf mate?!?! cant u see i have no bloody arm??"

"i can see that but urban dictionary said we have to have the word in the example"

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cereal box

a place u go to, to escape reality. no one else can enter your cereal box, only you!

brian: i went into my cereal box last night it was great!
shaun: huh? what are you high?!
brian: no dude you should go into your cereal box sometime its great!
shaun: ...
brian: anything is possible when your-
shaun: dude?
brian: lalalalala in a cereal box!
shaun: ... poor ol brian. ok take him away boys.

(brian spent several years in the Cuckoo Puffs asylum, he was later found dead from suffocation inside a cereal box)

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