That Guy on Facebook

That insufferable douchebag whose personal ambition it is to annoy the dickens out of all 1500 of his friends by way of shamelessly detailed and meaningless updates on every twitch and philosophical musing. Almost always an educated white liberal trying to display his excessive knowledge about political behavior and economics.

I think it's great that your Ramen Noodles are taking too long to heat up in the microwave; however, you are slowly but surely making me hate every inch of you.

"That guy on Facebook is peeing in a Starbucks right now."
"What?"
"Never mind."

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Apple Chancery

The classiest goddamn font on Microsoft Word. It reminds one of the simpler times when people wore dumb shit like aprons all day and ran around in orchards singing religious songs and making friends with other white supremacists.

"Did you see that KKK recruitment pamphlet? What was that font?"
"How can you not know that? It's Apple Chancery. You are a dirty motherfucking whore for asking me that question."

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