Futuritis

The condition among twenty-somethings where the prospect of committing to anything (usually a relationship, though can also be a home purchase etc.. Grad school, btw, is a notable exception because it is itself often a way of avoiding the future.) causes a flare up in a passive-aggressive avoidance response, ultimately leading to a break-up/blow-up.

(Disclaimer: Futuritis technically means inflammation of the future. Deal with it, language Nazis.)

Ladyfriend Jane: I don't understand why John doesn't want me to move to Philadelphia.
Platonic Manfriend Pete: Jane, you're both 25 and you've been dating for three years. John's got futuritis; there's no way he wants you to move in with him, but he's never going to tell you that. Because he wants to give the business to some other skanks.
LFJ: John can suck my dick.
PMP: Indeed.

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