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A food-based euphemism to replace "being on the rag"... Meant to elicit thoughts of the moon and its phases
Woman: "I'm in full ketchup phase, but it will soon be waning."
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The most vile ninja weapon on Earth - two soiled tampons tied together
Ninja: "I can deal with how vile shit shuriken are, but I draw the line when it comes to chum chucks."
1) When a pregnant woman is so backed up with a baby that it won't come out!
2) Overdue child birth
Tammie's been pregnant forever! She's due any day with no signs of popping that bun out of her oven! It's like she's kidstipated!
An erect dick that does not extend the palm of a hand
HUSBAND - "That knife blade is shorter than the palm of my hand. That makes it street legal."
WIFE: "Same goes for your wee wee-wee."
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When someone other than yourself has sex in your tent or your car, this is the funky atmosphere that lingers.
"I'm not letting you borrow my tent for Bonneroo... I don't need your jizzmosphere tainting it."
1. When a dude has unprotected sex and immediately after regrets not putting a condom on.
2. When the one getting boned realizes there is no latex (or sheepskin if you're over 50) betwixt you both, you can exclaim "I condomeant to!"
FRIEND 1: Man, this chick I was banging was in her ketchup phase... I totally condomeant to after that discovery.
FRIEND 2: At least she wasn't in the "must-turd" phase.