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1. When a dude has unprotected sex and immediately after regrets not putting a condom on.
2. When the one getting boned realizes there is no latex (or sheepskin if you're over 50) betwixt you both, you can exclaim "I condomeant to!"
FRIEND 1: Man, this chick I was banging was in her ketchup phase... I totally condomeant to after that discovery.
FRIEND 2: At least she wasn't in the "must-turd" phase.
What broke last night.
Well, the condom broke so now I'm a father. Shit.
1505👍 148👎
Savior to many who fear child support.
Your mom and dad didn't use condoms at some point
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A rain jacket for your penis.
"Dad, what's a condom?"
"Honey, it's a rain jacket for your penis."
"Dad?!?! WHA T THE HELL??!!!!"
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Cheapest prevention of a thousand problems in existence. For just a buck, you can avoid thousands in court costs, child support, medical bills for some nasty STDs, and you KNOW the kid isn't yours!
Condom: No glove, no love. Unless you're dumb enough to want an entirely different(and truly painful)kind of screwing.
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Haven't you heard?
If you're gonna make LOVE,
WEAR a GLOVE!!!
CAUSE SAFE SEX is GREAT SEX,
So you Better WEAR a LATEX,
Cause you don't want that LATE TEXT,
That I THINK I'M LATE TEXT!!!
Ha Ha, So wrap it up!!!
My flo so cold Chicken soup won't Help!!!
Jeremy- "I don't want to use a condom. I just don't feel anything."
Girl 1- "It's ok. I'm on the pill, baby."
Girl 2- {Two hours later} "Tough luck buddy. I got too much going on in my life to fuck it all up now."
168👍 19👎
A very smart invention to decrease the population and sti's
1)no glove no love
2)don't be silly wrap you willy
3)don't be a fool wrap your tool
4)don't be a ding-dong cover you shling- shlong
5)dont be a wenis protect you penis
6)dont share your sperm over your worm
7)before you spank her cover your wanker
8)If theres gunna be affection cover your erection
9)if your gunna banger cover your wanger
10) There only a buck get one before you fuck
11) Dont be stupid wear a fuckin condom
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