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Similar to the Destroyasaurus and Sir Mix-a-Lot. Creator of Rico Suave' and the David Hasslehoff model penis pump. A sip of Annoyasaurus is worth 3 bits on the mexican economy, unless it's Tuesday, in which case all bets are off and you are no longer considered "cool" by anyone important. So shut the fuck up, Annoyasaurus!
I've never been to London.
See - now shut the fuck up, Annoyasaurus!
16👍 4👎
An usually curved penis, served over ice.
Jackson: The old huckelbuck failed me for the last time!
Josh: Huh?
Sir Issac Newton: According to my hypothesis, I'm clinically dead.
Pee-Wee Herman: What a heartless bitch!
Norwegian guy: Does anyone have some ice? I've got a Norwegian fish hook over here...
18👍 20👎
One who consumes a lot of cereal.
Divorce lawyer: Well, you're really screwed now. Looks like your wife is going to take everything, and you're going to be stuck with a lot of alimony payments. If I wasn't such a shitty lawyer, you would probably be ok...but I'm a shitty lawyer, so you're really screwed. After you pay my fees you might not have enough money to eat. Oh well, I'm a shitty lawyer and I really don't care about you, or anything else for that matter.
Ted Bundy: Huh. Didn't see that coming. Guess I'll become a cereal killer.
84👍 21👎
The result of excessive drinking and debautchalism, a brown snake peek-a-boo is that poop that everyone periodically has (even girls that think they're "hot") that refuses to play nice. Instead, it comes out part way, then retreats, then comes out part way, then retreats...and so on and so forth. Fags (i.e. Jonesy) love the brown snake peek-a-boo.
Mike: Jonesy - your mom is hot.
Jonesy: I just had the best brown snake peek-a-boo!
26👍 6👎
1. Release feces into condom (it is unnecessary for the fecal matter to be your own)
2. Insert penis into condom with feces
3. Secure the creation with a rubber band or duct tape
4. Put on pants
5. Jog 3 miles
6. Release the gooey goodness from within the condom
7. Delicately place the masterpiece into a whole wheat sausage bun
7. Murder the penis owner with an ardvark or a hammer
8. Sever the penis with a craftsman product, preferably one with rust (for flavor)
9. Add condiments as necessary
10. Serve at room temperature
Jackson: I've just run 47 miles.
Jonesy: Ya, but did you make a chuck wagon?
Jackson: Of course!
Jonesy: Where is T3 when you need him??
10👍 28👎
A vast and mystical place where souls are lost and diseases are contracted. Singularly responsible for the demise of western culture, knickers and Jackson.
Everyone that's ever been to Keesler: I'm feeling good about myself. Too good, in fact. Perhaps I need a trip to Keesler to remind me what a piece of shit I really am. Yes - that's the ticket! By golly, that'll cure me of everything good in my life!! Micromanage me into worthlessness because I LOVE it!!
52👍 14👎
The most horrible thing ever. Worse than genocide, fat people and ex-in-laws COMBINED. Words fail to accurately define the horribleness of a Minnesota Mauler. It is so bad, even John Stamos and Chuck Norris quiver at the notion of a Minnesota Mauler. Not surprisingly, liberals usually want to negotiate with a Minnesota Mauler.
John Stamos: Wow - look at the size of that Minnesota Mauler!
Liberal: Hello Minnesota Mauler - what a lovely day! Why don't we discuss our differences in a non-threatening and politically correct sort of way...I'm sure we can find common ground!
Chuck Norris: No way man - I'm outta here!
Liberal: There's no need for panic...I'm sure that if we just respect the maulers boundaries the mauler will respect...aaaarrrggghhhh...Mauler - no!!! No!! Stop that!! Minnesota Mauler...noooooooooooooo..........
21👍 48👎