one inch

The only difference between white and black people. ONE F*CKING INCH. If you are right in between, then you are loved by everybody.

OMFG!!! You know what?

What?

The only difference between white people and black people is one inch...

You mean that bitch left me for just an extra 2.56 centimeters??!

Yeah. Never thought of it like that...

53👍 14👎

flexting

A person texts so much, to the extent that it becomes regular excersize and said person's hands and arms become very muscular.

Because of flexting, I can text 320 words a minutes and bench my new, hotter girlfriend.

48👍 13👎

procrastibate

1) Procrastinating masturbation, only long enough to talk to your mother/girlfriend on the phone when she asks "What are you doing?" and you say "Nothing..." in case they have a hidden camera setup after the last time you told them that.

2) Masturbating instead of doing your english homework and then texting your teacher for an "extension".

No, I procrastibated! ;)

76👍 16👎

Resolution List

The list that you make at the beginning of the new year right before you go back to school or work of the the things that you want to accomplish that year. "This year will be different!", you think as you put the list in your bedside drawer and go out to runs some errands.

Six months later, you find the list again during spring cleaning and discover that you haven't done a single thing on that f*cking list!!! You crumple the list up and throw it away, realizing again how crappy your life is....

SOB!!! I haven't done anything on this f*cking resolution list! Screw it, I'm going to the bar...

AGGGGGHHHHHH!!!! This list is the epitemy of my worthlessness.

54👍 4👎

TPCAST

1) A method to figuring peotry in English class.

2) Sleeping with your English teacher and "casting" (skeeting) your TP (semen) upon her "poetry" (vagina).

Student 1: "TPCAST helped me finish the poetry homework!!!"

Student 2: "Oh yeah, I TPCAST the teacher and didn't even have to do it. I got a 100 for participation and extra credit!"

Student 1: Lucky bastard... *rips up homework*

48👍 2👎

Cherry Cocktail

Eating out a girl while she's on her period.

Dude 1: "I totally gave this girl a cherry cocktail last night."

Dude 2: "That's just sick..."