ear beetle

A small, wireless ear-piece used in conjunction with a mobile phone. The ear-piece looks like a beetle crawling out of one's ear.

YOU: Did you see that phat new ear beetle from Plantronics?
YOUR FRIEND: Hells yeah!

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satisfiction

A claim of satisfaction when the reality is complete and utter dissatisfaction.

Your friend: How's the married life treating you?

You: No complaints.

Your friend: Sounds like satisfiction, if you ask me.

You: Hells yeah!

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postheating

When you accidentally leave the oven on, but are unwilling to admit to your significant other that you're an idiot.

SO: Did you forget to turn the oven off?
YOU: No, I'm just postheating.

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red lie

A statement told with complete awareness that the other person knows the statement to be false. This type of lie is often told and accepted to avoid the fallout that might occur from dealing with reality.

Your friend: I heard your gf busted you at Nikki's last night.

You: Yeah, but it's not problem. She's so whipped that a simple red lie did the trick.

Your friend: Dude, she has no spine.

You: Hells yeah!

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