brown eye booger

What you call a small nut shard (peanut, almond, etc.) that gets caught around the outer edge of your anus causing an itchy, uncomfortable feeling. A common post poop occurance 1-2 days after eating any form of nut.

Pat: Why do you keep dancing around like that?
Jeremy: I ate a bunch of almonds last night and I keep gettting brown eye boogers in my ass. Be back in a minute, I need a re-wipe.

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ballwash

a phenomenon that happens to males while pooping on an oversensitive auto flush toilet.

Steve: I was taking a dump at Home Depot, reached down to answer my phone, it triggered the autoflush and it drenched my sack.

Jeremy: Dude, sounds like you got a ballwash.

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