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Canada's History is a slang term for the space between a post-menopausal woman's breasts, implying their age and worthlessness. Often heard of in geriatric pornography or when encountering cougars at the bar.
"Dude, Canada's History is looking really bleak from here."
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Inspired by the great Stephen Colbert, Canada's History is a depraved sex act in which a gigantic moose head is mounted over the stanley cup and then used as a seat for the female during intimate times. Then Grade A Canadian Maple syrup is poured over the private parts of the loving couple for extra sweet lubrication. Finally the contents which spill into the Stanley Cup during copulation are consumed at the the end of the festivities with a hardy yelp of "HOW'S ABOOT THAT CANADIAN HISTORY?!". An oil painted portrait of Stephen Colbert hung next to the moose head is optional.
-"Dude I had to take aboot five showers to get the sticky off from that crazy Canada's History last night."
-"I pulled off the nastiest Canada's History with your mom last night."
-"Thank god for Stephen Colbert or we would not have Canada's History."
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according to Stephen Colbert, "A depraved American sexual act involving moose antlers, maple syrup, and the Stanley Cup"
Man, I just did Canada's History on your mom, and she loved it!
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A sex act so depraved, that it could not be described in detail on cable television. It involves moose antlers, a jug of maple syrup, and the Stanley Cup. It is widely held that the moose antlers are used to sodomize two males simultaneously while they jerk off using maple syrup as lube, and both cum into the Stanley Cup. It is at this time that a third party will drink the semen from the Stanley Cup and gurgle the words: Canada's History. This act was originally created and performed by Steven Colbert of the Colbert Report.
Man, that party was crazy. That part with the Canada's history totally blew my mind, and ruined the party completely. That Steven Colbert guy is sick.
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(Noun) A sex act performed primarily in the continental U.S. which involves the use of a cup, preferably Stanley's, some form of lubricant, generally syrup, and the boney appendages of an idiotic ungulate that is associated with the country upon which the sex act is named after. The act begins by filling the cup with the syrupy goodness that is maple nectar, then pouring it upon a naked U.S. citizen while screaming "were not going to take it!!" Then the two, or 15, individuals involved in the act take the boney appendages, spank each other with them, and commence to get down and dirty (generally moosey style). Can be performed on a ice rink
I can't come into work today I'm too traumatized, we had Canada's History last night.
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A sex act so vile it is banned in many countries and only one person has been brave enough to mention it on TV: Stephen Colbert.
Not much is known about it because so very few people have actually performed it. It is rumored that "putting it all in" is the hardest part.
Canada's History fetish films may be seen online.
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A crazy sex act that cannot be spoken of on tv involving moose antlers, maple syrup, and the Stanly Cup.
I just gave her the craziest canada's history of her life!
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