Mexican speed monkey

When a person does a line of any snorted drug off of a monkey's ass then licks the anis of the monkey

Dude I did a Mexican speed monkey last night

5👍 8👎

Standard Speed Test

A gay typing test that is a annoying wrong judgement of your typing skills.

Blayney this standard speed test is crap!

4👍 6👎

The Speed Of Tom Araya

The act of singing a Slayer song perfectly, the speed, lyrics, and pitch correct. No one mortal being can do this, except for Tom Araya, who is superhuman.

Originally thought up by Johnny Qyxzzy

Slayer Fan 1: Hey dude, can you go at the speed of Tom Araya?

Slayer Fan 2: I wish! No one can, man.

2👍 2👎

Speed Boat-ing

1. To procrastinate to the point of avoiding the thing completely
2. To do a job so badly nobody wants it, anyway.

Boss: What is this shit?
Employee: I was Speed Boat-ing...
Boss: You're fired!!!

2👍 2👎

high speed dsl's

1) exceeding dsls and dial up at an exceedingly high rate.

2) having dsls and performing filatio at an excedingly high speed

Sharky's high speed dsl's left my shaft soft and flacid

5👍 7👎

hillbilly speed bump

It is an armadillo, sometimes called hillbilly speed bumps due to the fact that they come out of nowhere and if you were to run over one, it sometimes causes a rocking effect that occurs going over a regular speed bump.

Passenger: ARMADILLIO!
Driver: NO, THATS A HILLBILLY SPEED BUMP!
(Passenger puts seatbelt on)

1👍 1👎

midnight speed streaking

when a person goes out at midnight and goes streaking in a fast vehicle of some sort such as a bike, a rollerblades, a scooter, a skateboard or longboard, or a convertible

mark: hey do you want to go midnight speed streaking?
drew:sure, i love to feel a good breeze around my genitals

1👍 1👎