Random
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Random
When a woman rides a man's face until he suffocates, but she lets him have one hand free to wrap around his penis, so he can have his weapon in hand as he does.
"Keith is dead? What happened??"
"His wife gave him a Ride of the Valkyrie, so at least he died a warrior's death."
4👍 1👎
What a sound engineer does during a performance or while mixing music in a recording studio.
I spend last weekend riding the faders at the music festival
3👍 1👎
Going for a drive deliberately to smoke weed.
I just rolled two fatty's, you down for a bake ride?
3👍 1👎
When a female lying on her back lets go of the dildo she is using while it's still penetrating her, then contracts and relaxes causing the dildo to rise and/or fall back into her.
Pervert; "So, I watched some pretty sick porn last night.."
Pedophile; "Oh yeah?... what made it so good?"
Pervert; "Some porn star was doing the casper ride on the hood of a jeep!"
3👍 3👎
When you have anal sex with a person that hasn't wiped thier ass properly
Gee it wasn't much fun having a dirty ride with DJ Flash Gordon!
12👍 10👎
When someone rides in a car in the trunk (because there aren't enough seats, they're sneaking into a drive-in, getting kidnapped, etc.). I'm not sure where this comes from -- a friend of mine said it once and then 2 years later I asked him about it and he insisted that he'd never heard of it before (LIAR!). If anyone knows its origin please post it.
I can only fit six in my car -- looks like someone's gonna be riding superman.
11👍 9👎
U.S. Govt. take home unmarked car. Only allowed for officers who must respond to work outside regular hours, not allowed for personal use (1st offense, 30 days off w/o pay up to termination!)
Agent Smith: I got fired for picking up b*tches in my G-Ride.
Agent Smith (Different Agent Smith): Well, it was given to you for work.
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