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After I take a big shit, I'll woop out the masturbation roladex and shine some pages.
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The art of improvisational masturbation
If the stress of life has you down try to your hand at free-form Masturbation as a relaxation exercise.
when another person preforms oral on you and you kiss afterwards...
person 1: yo man i was with a girl last night and she blew me
person 2: did you kiss afterwards?
person 1: yes...
person 2: that's second hand masturbation
The time where no one is home and someone is coming home and your masturbating
Jim was having a good time during masturbation rush hour right before his family came home
Masturbating with one or more guys with at least a 6 feet distance separation. It also includes Skype and Zoom and any cam sites.
Since the coronavirus outbreak--no more circle jerks--its only social distance masturbation for me.
With Social Distance masturbation the only chance of spreading disease is if a guy shoots more than 6 feet and hits you!
After 30 minutes in the community pool I gave myself The Old Regular
Masturbating with pruned handswhen you rub one out with pruned hands and it feels like an old man is jerking you off!
When you spend too much with yourself (and Pornhub), so it affects your personal and professional sides of life.
Contrary to common belief, having a female partner doesn't prevent person with CMO from masturbation.
-Dear, we need to talk. I'm your wife, and we have regular sex, but you still locking in your room, watching your stupid porn and enjoying yourself.
-I talked to doctor, and he said I have CMO. -What? -Compulsive masturbation disorder