i.e. this is when one derives sexual pleasure contemplating an object or subject, and/or overthinking something outwith their expertise resulting in grandiosity from confirmation bias
She spent her days in intellectual masturbation over the one that got away...
A TV show that losers watch to beat off to low-cut Victorian corsets and fade-out sex scenes on PBS Masterpiece, formerly known as Masterpiece Theater.
Derek: Are coming down to the bar Sunday night?
Alistair: Nah, I’m gonna lay back and unzip for Jane Austen on Masturbate Theater.
A person who plays on their cellphone while on the toilet
I think there is cellular masturbation going on in the stall over because he is laughing for no reason whatsoever.
psychopathic masturbation that leads to admission to a mental facility.
“i found her taking part in deranged masturbation”
An anti-masturbation cross is a device used by wankerphobic Christians. It combines the cross with straps to keep people from the age of 5+ from masturbating. It should be ended to help end wankerphobia.
John's parents are going to buy an anti-masturbation cross. I'm praying for him. I think Seb may have tipped them off.
Talking just to please yourself.
Twitter is a great place to see audible masturbation at work, Or a trump speech.
Someone who can masturbate secretly in public.
I'm a masturbation Legend because I got off in my CCD teacher's office.