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i.e. this is when one derives sexual pleasure contemplating an object or subject, and/or overthinking something outwith their expertise resulting in grandiosity from confirmation bias
She spent her days in intellectual masturbation over the one that got away...
Someone who can masturbate secretly in public.
I'm a masturbation Legend because I got off in my CCD teacher's office.
A TV show that losers watch to beat off to low-cut Victorian corsets and fade-out sex scenes on PBS Masterpiece, formerly known as Masterpiece Theater.
Derek: Are coming down to the bar Sunday night?
Alistair: Nah, I’m gonna lay back and unzip for Jane Austen on Masturbate Theater.
An anti-masturbation cross is a device used by wankerphobic Christians. It combines the cross with straps to keep people from the age of 5+ from masturbating. It should be ended to help end wankerphobia.
John's parents are going to buy an anti-masturbation cross. I'm praying for him. I think Seb may have tipped them off.
Talking just to please yourself.
Twitter is a great place to see audible masturbation at work, Or a trump speech.
A person who plays on their cellphone while on the toilet
I think there is cellular masturbation going on in the stall over because he is laughing for no reason whatsoever.
psychopathic masturbation that leads to admission to a mental facility.
“i found her taking part in deranged masturbation”