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Humpty dumpster

A physical act where upon the chef places an egg inside their rectum and cracks it with the sphincter allowing only egg white to drip upon the desired surface.

I dropped a Humpty dumpster on her chest.

by Nabc February 25, 2024


humpty-fuck

In interface development, the act of taking a shitty, broken, shattered visual design, data model, or prototype and putting it back together to form some sort of pristine fuckin' egg to serve up to the user.

"Let me get this straight. You want me to humpty-fuck that shit into something usable?"

by MangoBonespurs October 17, 2018


Humpty Stumpty

Noun. Refers to an amputee with serious anger problems, to the point where their presence causes everybody around them to not have a good time and lose their buzz.

Man with no legs sits in wheelchair, angry: I fucking hate this place. Fuck all of you motherfuckers.
Nearby bystander, listening to the amputee bitch and bitch and can't take it anymore: Shut the fuck up, Humpty-Stumpty. Maybe you just got off on the wrong, uh, "foot." Maybe you have a, ya know, "leg up" on the competition. You look like you're a bit, uh, "stumped." Wow, I really put my, uh, foot in my mouth there. Sometimes you just have to take things one, um, ya know, "step" at a time. Stop being such a fucking buzzkill before I tip over your wheelchair and light your bitch ass on fire. Okay, Humpty Stumpty?

by Jack-the-stripper-ripper March 25, 2024


Humpty Fuckty

The act of having a poo (Humpty) while also having a sexual intercourse (Fuckty).

Usually done in airport loos (notably Luton) where time is critical.

Have we got time for a quick humpty fuckty. before boarding? Really don't want to be late for Portugal but can kill 2 birds with 1 stone…

by SaintBlue October 3, 2024


Humpty-Dumptied

This wonderful event starts out with a man sitting on a wall to show off his crotch to a woman he has a crush on. To show the woman that he is mating material, he will hump the wall in hopes of moistening her lady garden. However, he does not realize that humping the hard wall will stimulate his spinky and cause a great fall... of shit. The poopy will land below on the woman, and all hopes of mating will be crushed.

Tyrant: Yo boss, happy Friday. Any fun plans for the weekend?

The Boss: Yea I was gonna go to the Meat Market tonight for some juicy Italian sausage, but I accidentally Humpty-Dumptied my wife last night and I gotta make it up to her.

Tyrant: Bro... you’re gonna have to explain this one.

The Boss: Okay.. so I hopped on our little wall between our living room and kitchen and figured I would try to turn her on. Turns out.. I only turned on my shit wagon and inadvertently plopped a log right on her dome. Safe to say I won’t be getting dome for a while.

Tyrant: Damn dude I’m so sorry to hear that. Hope she doesn’t get POO-TSD from that. Next time wear your Shitbit, as it would’ve warned you that logs were a brewin’.

by Stoney69 December 18, 2020


Humpty Dumptus

The act of performing a number two; a dump; relieving one's bowels

I will be back, I must go perform a humpty dumptus

by TW1ST3R November 25, 2012


Humpty

The fuel of nightmares, typically an egg or a previous English king.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.

by poroekd October 14, 2022