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Something to help you track the number of times you jerk off in a day. Great to compare with others and attempt to find out who's the biggest pervert.
I don't remember...I don't keep a self-abuse log!
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The act of being so convinced that your worst fear is going to come true that you force it to become true, whether intentionally or unintentionally.
Common Examples:
*people who are so afraid they are going to be dumped, they dump their boyfriend/girlfriend/ spouse as a precautionary measure.
*companies who are in financial trouble who's managers run the company into the ground through their lame attempts to prevent the company from failing;
*an employee who underperforms and gets fired;
Suzie: So, Lisa, how is it going with Ted?
Lisa: Oh, I dumped him last week.
Suzie: But it seemed like things were going so well!
Lisa: Na, I felt like he was going to end it with me so I dumped him first.
Suzie: That's like the third guy you have dumped in the past few months!
Lisa: Yeah but nobody wants to be with me, anyway!
Suzie: Sounds to me like you have mastered Paranoid Self Fulfillment!
-See also (offensive rebound)
CEO: Staff, sales are down so we need to determine how to save the company.
Employee 1: Well first off we should reduce our commitment to quality customer service and customer satisfaction.
Employee 2: I also think we should put some serious pressure on our top sales performers to bring us more business, and make it clear to them if they don't we will show them the door.
Employee 3: It would also be good if we skimp on our ingredients and aren't so quality control oriented.
CEO: Great ideas, everyone!
Janitor: These guys are on their way to paranoid self fulfillment!
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A self hanging wedgie is basically a self wedgie but hanging your undies on something higher then you.
I am doing a self hanging wedgie right now.
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When the dog tries to find his own sexual pleasure by using your arm as a self service checkout.
Jimothy: Look at Jeremiah coming for a self-service stroke.
Oswald: He looks like he's only going for half.
Jimothy: Yes, he has not collected all of his items.
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Bigotry against members of one's own race, also very ignorant
Adrian and Jahmari are exect examples of self hatred.
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a girl named ceci who claims she is a million pounds overweight but is a skinny bitch
one who walks around telling people she is whore..hence self proclaimed..even thou yes she is still a virgin and has gone third like once.
one who went to a catholic school..claims to be extremely religion and prays all the time ..but yet anytime the word "jesus" or "god" is mentioned she rolls her eyes and laughs..
one who got her ass saved because her bestfriend/sister saved her stupid butt from getting arrested
a girl who makes fun of her bestfriend/sister because she so called has a fish face.. sorry i wasnt photogenic 3 years ago.. im so ashamed. sigh.
one who runs around yelling "my ass is so big" and enjoys the thought of it "jiggling"
one who dissaproves of ..firecracker laughs..
one who claims she is trying to go natural with her makeup and yet wears more makup than anyone i know.. gotta give her credit..she doesnt go all the way with her eyeliner i guess that is considered "toned down".
one who bitches about everything.
one who calls herself "cecilia cecilia"
hates when people pronounce her nickname ceci..like sessy
complains about her issues in backet weaving class in front of a little gay kid and lesbian chicks.
and yells whoohooo over here in front of a bunch of people when no one actually said anything..
one who in religion class would describe herself in one word as "slutty"
one who makes fun of people who might die from keeping there tampon in to long
did you see that self proclaimed whore ceci the other day? damn her butt was jiggling.
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Person 1:- Are you thinking of marrying your girlfriend, settling down and having kids?
Person 2:- No, I think of her more of a self cleaning fleshlight.
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