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getting humped in the arm by a man with a tiny dick
Who was that handsome fella mosquito machine gunning you?
Oh, that's my boyfriend, you should meet him.
A machine that forces you to pay it to get access to your rightfully owned money. Also a popular job career for criminals
"Hey, can we got get Popeyes"
"Hold on, I gotta get money from the ATM Machine first"
(Abstract/noun/adj/slg)- when you've spent so much of your life wasted on whiskey and alcoholic similes, you awaken one day to realize you are now 50 years old and your sweet children have grown to adulthood without your guidance or parental presence. No matter how bad you want to wind back the clock, the time machine has broken, and you are stuck in nightmare land.
Theorizing that one could time travel within his own lifetime, Sam Fukkit stepped into the whiskey time-machine accelerator... and vanished. Oh boy.
Pedophilic rapists in lab coats calling themselves boylover nambla or doctor
Machete welding machine is not a human being
The act where a man/woman sticks a Popsicle up their lover's ass and lets it melt in there before bending down to drink it out of their ass, taking on the nature of a slush machine you would find at a 7-Eleven.
The AC was broken and it was sooo freaking hot, so Karli and I resorted to cooling each other off with the slush machine until the air conditioner repairman got here.
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When someone just can’t stop fapping…
Guy 1: *fap fap fap…*
Guy 2: Bruh? Get a room!
Guy 3: He’s been fapping for hours, I think we should leave and call the police…
*a few minutes later*
“This is the police! Put your hands up!”
Guy 1 proceeds to fap faster and faster…
“Holy fuck, he’s like a fap machine!”
*the police run away in fear of the imminent explosion…*
The candy machine was a device used for masturbation in ancient times and was presented by a kid named Elias on youtube, he was the creator of this masturbation device that yanked your balls and tickled the groin. Elias went on to die from internal groin bleeding....
"I just bought a brand new version of The candy machine!"
"That's fucking awesome, just remember to oil up so it doesn't rip the testies"