Random
Source Code
Random
A clause in the NFL rule book that prevents the Green Bay Packers from reaching the playoffs, regardless of their regular-season standing, if they lose their last five regular season games.
The pack has been eliminated from the playoffs due to the "the packers are fags clause" in part due to losing Favre to an injury.
4👍 6👎
The act of ejaculating on a woman's chin and upper lip and then sitting in her lap and telling her what you want for Christmas.
So I game my girlfriend a Santa Clause beard last night and she loved it so now she is getting me a PS3 for Christmas.
2👍 2👎
Santa's Head Elf at the North Pole. This Elf is a male and he communicates directly with Santa. He collects any requests directed at Santa, employs protection for Santa, acts as Santa's Public Relations Manager, keeps the Naughty/Nice list up to date, and acts as a Leason between the North Pole an the Un-seen Services council witch includes the Easter Bunny, The Tooth Fairy, the Boogie Man, and so on. Santa's Head Elf is also responsible for all other Elves, Reindeer and the satisfaction of Mrs. Clause. In Case of Emergency such as the 2001 invasion by Jack Frost, Santa's Head Elf is in charge of employing the North Poles Emergecny Policies.
No one knows more about the North Pole than Hassel Elf Clause because he has to.
2👍 2👎
Someone you hang out with because they make you feel thinner and more glamorous than you really are.
Comes from the legend that "I Love Lucy" sidekick Ethel Vance was contractually obligated to remain 20 pounds overweight.
My sister loves to call me when my life's a train wreck. I'm her Ethel-clause friend.
2👍 2👎
The women who has sex with santa to make elfs
Fucl me in tje pusdy mrs santa clause
1👍 2👎
A male cannot be a member of the City Boyz if he is a virgin. Future approved.
Bro I can’t even join the City Boyz because of the City Boy Virgin Clause.
Advice invariably found in the literature handed out by purveyors of so-called "alternative" or "complementary" medicine, in which customers intending to buy quackery are advised to check with their GPs first to find what "mainstream medicine" has to say.
The venomous diatribes against real medicine, and science and rationality in general, behind the closed doors of the "alternative" movement should tell you all you need to know about the sincerity of the quack-my-ass clause. On the face of it, it sounds obvious, egalitiarian and big-hearted. However, the real intention of the advice is to ensure that if anyone dies or is incapacitated by taking the quack's advice or products (or by swearing off real medicine, which may not be advised on the packaging but is a stock in trade in the "alternative" industry), if the matter comes to court the quack's lawyer can claim that the product or the service was misused; obviously, they didn't check with their GP, how unfortunate, it's not our fault.
Besides, the quack knows perfectly well their client is unlikely to see their GP or specialist about whatever the problem is, or if they do they won't pay much attention to their advice. If they did, they wouldn't be coming to the quack in the first place.
Ah, here's the booklet; 123 symptoms this product may be able to cure, 256 further lists of types of people the product may be able to help, 25 more natural products from the same factory that might be able to balance your energies and so on, and, oh yes, the quack-my-ass clause.
5👍 4👎