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Heavy Metal Music is a bunch of retards attempting to make noise and call it music. They think that screaming into a microphone and playing guitars and drums at the same time passes off as music, obviously they are wrong.
Listeners of heavy metal are usually loners who stick to their own bunch of people and hate everything other people like. People who listen to Heavy Metal are extremely critical and like to criticize everything because they do not like it.
Furthermore, people who listen to Heavy Metal music hate mainstream music because unfortunately their music can't make it to mainstream as it is not music but just random, retarded sounds and screams which have no meaning.
Most Heavy Metal is based on Satan and self harm. They also like to sing about the government and how it is corrupt, but the bands who sing about this do not realise that it is the same government that made them rich.
Heavy Metal is pure evil and should not be regarded as music.
Music is a sound perceived as pleasingly harmonious, Heavy Metal however, is not pleasing nor harmonious, it is the complete opposite.
Emo: RARARARARARAR
Normal Person: Err....
Emo: ARARARARARRROOOROROROROROr
Normal Person: Are you trying to be a lion again?
Emo: No i'm singing Heavy Metal.
Normal Person: Oh..ok....i'm just going to leave now
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A dereviation of power metal that solely focuses on the fairies and goblins, or other mythical creatures, side of the original power metal genre.
Andrew: Dave what's that shit you're listening to, Geek Metal?
Dave: It's Iron Maiden!
Andrew: Oh, yeah, that music you're always listening to while playing warhammer to spurr you on while you're drinking cum out of your own arse?
Dave: Yeah!
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Power Metal:
A cheesy and fast paced sub-genre of metal
Pronounced: Pow-ur met-ahl.
Power metal is a sub-genre of speed metal known as "true" metal by nerdy teens who only listen to it and ignore most other metal bands outside the genre (the irony, of course is that they limit themselves to one subgenre of metal and thusly earn little to no respect from other metallers, as most metal fans love a broad spectrum of metal, and indeed, other music genres, such as blues, jazz, etc), and "cheese" or "bullshit" metal by everyone else and is also reviled by most thrash/death/black (actual) metallers for it's lack of substance and wanton insertion of elves, dragons and other nerdy nonsense into lyrics. Broader fans of metal despise it because they fear people judge metal on the cheesey songs by these bands. This is not to dismiss the genre entirely, as it contains many talented musicians, however, the most (undeservedly) popluar band in the genre, Dragonforce (or, alternatively, Fagonforce) gives the genre a worse name than it deserves, what with it's legion of pre-teen to mid-teen fanboys, frothing at the mouth over insinuations of artificially sped up songs, little variation between songs, terrible vocals, overrated guitar work and drummer of unnotable worth. People are, however mislead, into believing dragonforce is the b-all and end-all of power metal, just because it's on guitar hero. As much as power metal is disliked among many metallers, even among broader metal fans whose taste includes power metal, Dragonforce is often cited as being mis-representative of the sub-genre and is similarly hated.
Thrash/Death/black metaler upon hearing Dragonforce: "What the fuck is this dogshit power metal?"
"True" Metal fan: "This is the greatest band ever!!!!"
Thrash/Death/black metaler: "Ever heard of Wintersun, Carcass, Megadeth, Pantera, Sepultura, Children of Bodom, or In Flames (Old, ie, before they became metalcore suckage)?"
"True" Metal fan: "What's that?"
or alternatively: "I don't like those bands, they're too heavy" (in the metal community, this is akin to declaring you are a pussy and will invariably leave you without any credability on your musical crticism ability)
If the "True" Metal fan gives the first response, often, they are allowed to hear said metal examples, and can be converted on the spot. However if the response is the latter, give up and leave. Such people are often too young or worse, musically stunted, especially if they are only capable of liking one sub-genre of metal and the worst band in that sub-genre.
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Metal bands adopted by Geeks in an attempt to not look so geeky. (The Bands them selves can be under other Metal Genres, geeks just listen to these bands in an attempt to look cool, it does not necessarily make the band geeky)
Examples of Geek Metal include, Megadeath, Slayer, Iron Maiden etc.
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Recieving a blow job from a girl with braces. The braces snag your pubic hair, and painfully pluck them.
That Michelle has the Metal Pluck. The only thing you would get out of a blow job from her would be teary eyes.
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A Device for masturbating for men to shove it in to something more warm, it can be heated and lubricated.
Dick shoved his penis into a metal vagina which gave him a quicker orgasim.
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phrase used when describing someone has a mouth full of braces (hence the 'metal' part).
dude, look at that little Wap! he has his metal to the pedal!
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