Johnny Bench

To assume the "catchers squat" hovering over a public toilet. Necessitated, by the absence of "ass gaskets"

"Dude I had to Johnny Bench it, they were out of ass gaskets"

OR

"That was a nasty toilet, I had to make my own 4 way out of tissue. " Bro, I just Johnny Benched it"

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Bench Sex

Bench sex is primarily preformed on a bench of some sort (like the kind you can find at your local soccer fields). Many styles of benches can be used to have bench sex as long as one participant may be bent over it, or lied on it.

kid1: woah did you see sean bend kat over that bench and bang her?

kid2: yea! that was some hot bench sex!

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park benching

v. 1. To have qualities of a hobo. 2. To sleep or spend much time on a park bench. 3. To be mistaken for a hobo.

also: park bench, park benched, and park bencher(one who park benches)

Man Jesse, you're such a park bencher! Always park benching!

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Bench press

A word only used in roasts made by the finest roblox gamers.

Roblox gamer 1: Your dad has the gay
Roblox gamer 2: No u
Roblox gamer 1: Listen kid I’ll bench press your nan's coffin
Roblox gamer 2: oof

Packing The Bench

Packing The Bench is the process of managing to fart while needing to poop, all the while avoiding accidentally sharting. The gas passes around the stool, removing gas pockets and allowing the stool to collect and bulk.

"Yo, I'd avoid standing behind me, I'm really packing the bench over here."

Bench Goblins

Similar to SARM Goblins, bench goblins are most often a large group of teenage boys ages 14-18. They travel in hoards and invade gyms at peak hours. You will most often see them taking up the bench presses or any benches by the dumbbells so they can hit chest for the 4th time in a row during a week. Often times they take up multiple benches during all times of the day to hit a very mediocre set of 135.

“Dude you wanna bench press and set a new PR?”

“Nah we cant, there’s a group of bench goblins taking up the benches, they will be there for at least an hour.”

Jack Bench

An seat often found in an enclosed bathroom shower. The structure is typically built-in and constructed of masonry and tile, or free-standing and made of a sturdy, pressure-treated hard wood. The design reduces stress on the user’s lower back during covert masturbation.

I put an offer on the house as soon as I saw that the shower in the master bathroom featured a jack bench.