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Autofellatio

You looked it up because you just tried it.

Autofellatio does NOT make you gay.

by WhoDatFreshBoi July 28, 2017

27👍 6👎


Autofellatio

The hermetic profession of sucking one's own penis.

Nobody in the history of man has reported being able to perform this almost mystical feat because the few percentage of the world population who actually can perform autofellatio never leave their houses. However diaries and memoirs have been found, post-mortem.

Guy 1: Hey I haven't seen John lately, have you?
Guy 2: Haven't you heard? He discovered he could perform autofellatio and dropped out of school to move to a trailer park.

by JohnnieWalkerBlue February 12, 2010

86👍 43👎


Autofellatio

Autofellatio is the act of oral stimulation of one's own penis as a form of masturbation. While few human males are sufficiently well-endowed and/or flexible enough to perform the frontbend required, increased flexibility achieved via gravity-assisted positions, and physical training such as gymnastics, contortion or yoga may make it possible for some. Fewer than 1% of men can successfully suck or lick their own penises.

David: I pleased myself last night by means of autofellatio.
Sean: Gay...

by Sean Mooney November 10, 2006

7278👍 8094👎


Lucid Autofellatio

lu•cid au•to•fel•la•ti•o

/ˈlo͞osəd ɔtoʊfəˈlāSH(ē)ˌō/

Oral stimulation of one's own penis while in a lucid dream

Me: I think I'm about to get fired for being late
My dog: why's that?
Me: I had another Lucid Autofellatio happen
My dog: couldn't nut again?
Me: would I have been late to work if I was able to?

by TheTallestPsychonaut December 16, 2021


Autofellatioic Evolution of Humans

As the population grows over it's potential, the evolutionary process begins to take place. Humans will adapt to be able to perform autofellatio in order to reduce sexual desire. This will cause a dramatic drop in rates of sexual intercourse, allowing the human population to return to a more reasonable size that the one we cannot currently maintain.

The world is getting to large. Evolution must take place, as it did in other organisms. The way humans will adapt to influence a decline in a sizable population is the Autofellatioic Evolution of Humans.

by Ace. October 17, 2012

9👍 1👎


Autofellatio

The act of sucking your own dick

Ancient Greeks were really weird , like don't get me wrong but they did autofellatio.

by WEEEDEEER October 14, 2018