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Daytime Television

A bland, nauseating mix of courtroom TV, televangelists, tawdry talk shows, infomercials, moldy game shows, depressing news stories, gagworthy soap operas that lower the already low standard, televised church services, inaccurate weather forecasts, increasingly vacant programs for pre-K children, and instructional quilting/home improvement programs. The TV equivalent of cold oatmeal, or cafeteria food.

Antonyms: Primetime Television, adult swim.

"I'd rather go to work/school with a stomach virus than sit at home nibbling saltines and watching Judge Joe Brown. Daytime Television just makes me feel sicker."

by The Cheshire Kat May 29, 2008

83๐Ÿ‘ 7๐Ÿ‘Ž


daytime tv

EVIL, what the house-wives watch, clearly the reason for the brainwashed people in this country.

infomericals on daytime tv make me feel fat.

by stray April 16, 2004

24๐Ÿ‘ 4๐Ÿ‘Ž


Daytime Insomnia

1. One result of procrastination.

2. A type of behavior performed during daylight hours marked by extreme procrastination. It is characterized by the shuffling around one's house or dorm for many hours in search of meaningless activities with unnaturally short durations (e.g. getting a drink of water or eating chocolates every five minutes, watching the television, listening to music, or playing a game all for five minutes yet in ten minute intervals). Such behavior is caused by the ever-present threat of doing work and the fear that committment to any other activity might preclude one from performing the said assignment or studying. All actions are results of cognitive processes which derive from a mild form of schizophrenia.

(Nick's mental process): Peanuts. I love peanuts. *eats peanuts*. I need water. No, you need to start the assignment, now!. I don't want to start the assignment yet, though. *drinks water* I will eat some more peanuts. *eats peanuts*

by Jacob February 13, 2005

35๐Ÿ‘ 7๐Ÿ‘Ž


URN Daytimer

A person who can achieve just about anything they put their mind to. They are pretty much invincible, and to boot their dewy complexions and agreeable features continue to defy the term 'having a face for radio'.

'Wait , did that person just cure cancer by blinking their eyes?'
'Oh yeah, but they're a URN Daytimer so it's not surprising.'
'Seriously? So that guy on TV last week who climbed Mount Everest on a space hopp-'
'...A URN Daytimer. Yeah.'

by jemm_20 March 5, 2015

10๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


Daytime Ugly

A hooker who is so ugly, untalented, and generally unappealing that in order to make enough money to support her crack habit, she needs to stand out on the street during daylight hours as well as at night. While the daylight doesn't do her any favours, she is so desperate for a trick that she needs to be there for as much time as she can in the hope that someone, anyone, will give her $5 to eat their shit or something.

Look, there's another Daytime Ugly! What a disgusting hoe.

by cam8001 May 17, 2006

29๐Ÿ‘ 6๐Ÿ‘Ž


daytime boyfriend

This is a very sad but common occurrence among guys who try to treat women with respect. Females with insecurities in their intelligence, appearance, sexual ability, etc. need constant praise and reassurance. Daytime boyfriend's fill this need by showering these soulless leeches with the praise necessary for them to make it through the day. This praise is usually genuine, but its affect is in vain, as the cavernous void which are these females just grows larger. These well-meaning men never actually date the girls. The tramps are very adept at leading them along enough to continue the praise and adoration of their worshiper, without any actual reciprocation (sexual, or otherwise). Thus, the men are boyfriends during the day, hearing all the inane problems of these women and helping them cope with their gnawing lack of self-worth, and at night go home with their dick in their hand.
The only real cure is from a change in the male's behavior, seeing as how these exploitative females see nothing wrong with their platonic relationship. He must let his nuts drop and cease being a total bitch. A creative way to ruin this girl to any infatuated guy is to picture her wincing in the pain of constipation, and then letting loose a fudge dragon. You are welcome. (Note: This has been learned from experience.)

If you can't think of an example from the above definition, you are or will soon be a daytime boyfriend.

by CockontheWalk November 21, 2007

30๐Ÿ‘ 11๐Ÿ‘Ž


daytime playtime

The ability to hook up with a sex partner during normal business hours.

Hey baby/honey why don't we have some daytime playtime!

by Harleydog January 13, 2006

10๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž