Question to be made when you feel treated unfairly, made responsible for something you didnยดt do, or ordered to do something you feel not responsible for.
"Ok Alysa, take the dog for a walk"
"But Mom...did i kill your sister or something?
46๐ 19๐
The question you ask yourself or your friends after a night of heavy drinking. Often, you do not want to hear the response, but need to know if you should apologize to anyone or get checked for STDs.
You usually spend the rest of the day dwelling on the events of the past night and slapping yourself on the head saying "doh!"
yo what did i do last night?
Danced with some drunk chick on stage at the bar and busted your ass
10๐ 6๐
My fellow Americans, I have not been entirely truthful with you. I did creampie that girl. I impregnated her fetus with my sperm, and I am sorry.
Quagmire: My fellow Americans, I have not been entirely truthful with you. I did gigoogity that girl. I geschmoigiddied her geflavaty with my googus, and I am sorry.
Meg: What does that mean?
Peter: Shut up, Meg.
Stewie: Brian, what DOES this mean?
Brian: It means Quagmire was having sex with a pregnant woman and she made him come so hard he accidentally impregnated her fetus.
Lois: Uh, that's terrible!
Chris: That's not as bad as what the evil monkey does to me at night.
3๐ 2๐
Then why are you all up in my grill!
Did I say you can cook in my kitchen?
Then why are you all up in my grill!
Did I invite you to my business meeting?
Then why are you all up in my business?!?
31๐ 5๐
A sexual copypasta about Ahsoka Tano from Star Wars, where Obi-Wan Kenobi tells Luke Skywalker about Ahsoka in sexual descriptions.
Luke, did I ever tell you about Ahsoka Tano? She was your fatherโs exotic teenage alien apprentice, a fine piece of jailbait from a more civilized age. She had the tightest body and the perkiest little breasts in the galaxy; barely legal in most systems.
Anakin and I used to doubleteam her at the end of every successful campaign during the Clone Wars, and once in a while weโd even have the entire 501st run a train over her, part of official Jedi โtrainingโ of course. In time, she learned how to handle a meatsaber better than anyone in the Jedi Temple. She wore a miniskirt every day so we told her there were no panties in space, and since she was constantly doing acrobatics youโd get a glimpse of her orange pussy mid fight as sheโd do a flip while slicing a B2 Super Battledroid in half. It was surreal.
We taught her to grip her weapon backwards like a dildo and she constantly got captured by pirates and slavers almost every other day. It was ridiculous, like a constant porno Luke, you have no idea. And she was a good friend.
54๐ 11๐
I've finally done it. I made a text go blue. I'm so proud of myself for achieving this life goal. I can finally rest happy knowing that I did the world a favor! :)
1๐ 5๐
A blog by a college student about her stoner experiences.
I was reading Stuff I Did Hi yesterday; it is so funny!