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Said when somebody is so cold they would rather have their sexuality questioned than freeze to death
Guy1: goddamn im so cold
Guy2: you wanna get in this sleeping bag with me?
Guy1: ..... Ya fuck it id rather be gay than cold
9👍 5👎
You can get the dick.
"You look nice"
"Id bust ur ass too"
Easily the coolest school in Boise for the stylistically enabled. And this doesn't mean MLA format. If you like to wear the label, and not the design, you are welcome here. In addition, the majority of school-goers are upper middle class, so you can always find a friend with more good things than you could ever have.
Timberline High School is also the only school in Boise not noted as "needs school improvement," probably because there aren't enough students going to school everyday to take an accurate statistic.
That Timberline High School, Boise, ID is so more elitist-est than every other school in Boise, ID.
20👍 42👎
In an effort to educate and to promote understanding of our faith, I will recount the story of The Eight I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts, the sacred commandments that were given to Mosey the Pirate by the Flying Spaghetti Monster Himself. This is the story that has been handed down for hundreds of years by generations of the Pastafarian faithful:
While brooding atop Mount Salsa because he cannot find a Pirate ship, Mosey the Pirate captain receives some advice from the Flying Spaghetti Monster in the form of ten stone tablets. These were called the I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts by the Flying Spaghetti Monster, the "Commandments" by Mosey, and the "Condiments" by his Pirate gang. While there were originally ten I'd Really Rather You didn'ts, two were dropped on the way back down the mountain, with eight remaining. This event "partly accounts for Pastafarians' flimsy moral standards." The Flying Spaghetti Monsters commandments address worship of Him, the treatment of people of other faiths, sexual conduct, and nutrition.
THE EIGHT I'D REALLY RATHER YOU DIDN'TS
1.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Act Like A Sanctimonious Holier-Than-Thou Ass When Describing My Noodly Goodness. If Some People Don't Believe In Me, That's Okay. Really, I'm Not That Vain. Besides, This Isn't About Them So Don't Change The Subject.
2.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Use My Existence As A Means To Oppress, Subjugate, Punish, Eviscerate, And/Or, You Know, Be Mean To Others. I Don't Require Sacrifices, And Purity Is For Drinking Water, Not People.
3.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Judge People For The Way They Look, Or How They Dress, Or The Way They Talk, Or, Well, Just Play Nice, Okay? Oh, And Get This Through You Thick Heads: Woman=Person, Man=Person. Samey-Samey. One is Not Better Than The Other, Unless We're Talking About Fashion And I'm Sorry, But I Gave That To Women And Some Guys Who Know The Difference Between Teal And Fuchsia.
4.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Indulge In Conduct That Offends Yourself, Or Your Willing, Consenting Partner Of Legal Age AND Mental Maturity. As For Anyone Who Might Object, I Think The Expression Is Go F*** Yourself, Unless They Find That Offensive In Which Case They Can Turn Off The TV For Once And Go For A Walk For A Change.
5.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Challenge The Bigoted, Misogynist, Hateful Ideas Of Others On An Empty Stomach. Eat, Then Go After The B*******.
6.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Build multi million-Dollar Churches/Temples/Mosques/ Shrines To My Noodly Goodness When The Money Could Be Better Spent (Take Your Pick): A. Ending Poverty B. Curing Diseases C. Living In Peace, Loving With Passion, And Lowering The Cost Of Cable. I Might Be A Complex Carbohydrate Omniscient Being, But I Enjoy The Simple Things In Life. I Ought To Know. I AM The Creator.
7.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Go around Telling People I Talk To you. You're Not That Interesting. Get Over Yourself. And I Told You To Love Your Fellow Man, Can't You Take A Hint?
8.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You If You Are Into, Um, Stuff That Uses Alot Of Leather/Lubrication/Las Vegas. If The Other Person Is Into It However (Pursuant To #4), Then Have At It, Take Pictures, And For The Love Of Mike, Wear A CONDOM! Honestly It's A Piece Of Rubber, If I Didn't Want It To Feel Good When You Did It I Would Have Added Spikes, Or Something.
Christian: I love God and I follow the Bible to the letter... Oh yeah thats right all 10 commandments baby.
Pastafarian: Ummm well I'm not Christian, but I have about 8 id realy rather you didnts that I like to stick with. Though they are less intrusive and less asinine and aren't just meant for adults with the reasoning skills that of kids in preschool, it gets the idea across.
Christian: Well all those strippers and beers are going to send you straight to hell
Pastafarian: Hey now, I'd really rather you didn't say that.
319👍 31👎
when you forget how to spell die
i want to id e d e ii
1👍 1👎
A phrase used to describe a girls hotness
"damn did you see Hopes black g string sticking out of her pants, Id let her pee in my face just to see between her legs"
23👍 12👎
A millitary saying that means...you would rather accidently kill a civilian then the chance that it is not a civilian and he kills u..
so that way u go to court and get judged to see if u get jail time..
instead of going home in a body bag carried by your fellow soilders
soilder: that man has a wepon im going to take him down!
liberal fagot: no u cant he hasent shot at u yet! we have to wait for him to shoot and then u can engage in action.
soilder: wtf he has a wepon and its pointed in our direction! if he shoots at us 1 of us might get hit and die!
liberal fagot: thats a chance we have to take!
soilder: what the fuck ever id rather be judged by 12 then carried by 6
(bang bang)
liberal fagot: no i cant bealive u killed him without him killin 1 of us first!
220👍 168👎