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Bidet

When you edge a woman until she canโ€™t control herself and then you jackhammer fart right on her clit so she squirts all over your dirty asshole to clean it up.

Isabelle and I ran out of toilet paper last night so we had to perform the bidet in bed.

by darkraian December 30, 2022


Bidet

When one is being excessively feminine and or a big gaping asshole they are said to be "on the bidet"

"Haha I had sex with your mom last night"
"Dude get off the bidet"

by Philly-BA April 24, 2007

63๐Ÿ‘ 77๐Ÿ‘Ž


Bidet

A douche bag of the homosexual variety.

I can't believe he's making out with another man on the dance floor while his boyfriend is watching. What a bidet.

by soanim8ed July 17, 2010

34๐Ÿ‘ 46๐Ÿ‘Ž


A bidet

When a man/woman spits on another man or womanโ€™s asshole before anal sex

โ€œTommy I forgot my lube in the carโ€
โ€œThatโ€™s okay honey, Iโ€™ll just give you a bidetโ€

by Black cherry July 4, 2019

5๐Ÿ‘ 4๐Ÿ‘Ž


Bidet

1. A accessory water fixture located in or beside a toilet used for the purposes of cleaning one's arse.
2. A porcelain bowl with a water fixture used for the purposes of cleaning one's arse.

Example

Person 1: The supermarket was out of toilet paper! What are we going to do now? We can't possibly clean our arses.

Person 2: Have you considered retrofitting a bidet? Some can cost literally less that $50 on Amazon, are simple to install, saves you money and uses less water than toilet paper production in the long run, leaves your bum cleaner and without irritation, and you will never run out of cleaning power so long as there is running water. It also saves a shit tonne of toilet paper which means the toilet paper shortage won't affect you as much. They are superior in almost every way.

Person 1: That's absurd! I will never use a bidet. I'll just use newspapers to clean my arse.

Person 2: *Intensely, but quietly judging Person 1's life decisions.*

by Jackwerks01 April 9, 2020


Bidet

A vaginal cleaning tool.

I thought the bidet was a water fountain, boy was i wrong...

by LOLWTFBBQCHIPS March 18, 2005

43๐Ÿ‘ 70๐Ÿ‘Ž


Bidet

The name given to a person who enjoys the act of using oneโ€™s tongue on the anus in order to gain and or give sexual pleasure.

A bidet within a bathroom is a device used to clean oneโ€™s anus and buttocks. The tounge during the act of rimming in the same way cleans the very same area.

โ€œDid you take home Bidet last night?โ€

โ€œYes I did, and this morning Iโ€™m squeaky clean.โ€

by EggsUK February 25, 2010

13๐Ÿ‘ 20๐Ÿ‘Ž