Tight Rules

Meaningless phrase that sounds hip enough for nobody to question it. This enables you to sound like you have your finger on the urban pulse when in reality you sit in your country house all day playing classical music and looking at your monkey puzzle tree. Can be used as a response to pretty much any statement, depending on it's infliction.

1. (positive infliction) Aggresive looking teenagers: Hey! We've scored some buzz on the dip with the floonies up whitespit!
You(not comprehending): Tight Rules!

2. (negative infliction) Aggresive looking teenagers: Spuz monkey, dude. Our hicks got our number and now we fry in twenty-five, you ringin' what we jack?
You: Tight Rules, man. Tight Rules.

hammock rule

the rule that says it is impossible to be unhappy when you are on a hammock.

Things that follow the hammock rule:
- Hammocks
- Trampolines
- The Big Bang Theory theme song
- Bouncy castles
- Glow Sticks
- Glow in the dark stars
- Helium
- Silly string
- The Planets
- 11:11
- Calvin and Hobbes
- "Bazinga!"
- Monsters Inc
- Meet the Robinsons
- The Incredibles
- Art Attack
- Nutella
- Toaster Strudels

The Tip Rule

1. The process of planning the cost of anything you are willing to spend your money on with the idea you will spend the equivalent to that or less, in turn it results in costing more by at least 20%.

2. The final pricing of any advertised product.

The computer advertised for $499.99 comes to a final total of $687.32 with tax, warrantee, and spyware. The Tip Rule.

Dan: "I'm going to the bar and keeping it to $50 bucks."

Chris: " Remember The Tip Rule bro."

rule of possession

If you own it, it sucks.

"Your dog is so cute!"
"Yeah. You don't live with it. Rule of possession."

Rule of Puberty

The rule saying that if you date an ugly/not so attractive girl before the rest of puberty hits, she will be hotter later on and you will still be dating her, resulting in your success and the envy of your friends. Has a 9/10 success rate. Can also be applied to dudes.

Doug: "Ew man why is Johnny dating Jill, she isn't even hot"
Jim: "Rule of puberty, dude"

*1-2 years later*

Doug: "I would totally bone Jill now, too bad she's still dating Johnny"
Jim: "Told you man"

Rule #7

Rule 7 - never fall in love.

Rule #7- Never fall in love - it will break you into peaces

6👍 2👎

rule 2121

You cannot talk about COVID-19, the flu, Ebola, or any heart disease in tinder.

User: I would post a nude video today, but COVID-19 is hitting hard...
Follower: Rule 2121
User: ...