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A sport which only raises the question Why? It is performed by mindless drones who think it is going to get them into a better college and inadvertently causes a collapse of one's social life. Those who do the sport don't realize we have better technology then the oar to move a boat, things like sails and hell engines, but the smart coach seems to disguise this from his dumb rowers.
Student 1: "hey theres a party at Bill's house tomorrow, you goin'?"
Mindless Drone: "No theres a crew race I have to get to tomorrow and I'll be dead tired afterword."
6👍 40👎
One of the least physically demanding sports, it requires only basic endurance, strength, or willpower. Interestingly, it inspires a ridiculous sense of entitlement in all those who participate in it. Crew members are experts at devising excuses for basic strength tests, and are mostly made up of rejects from other sports teams such as football, wrestling, hockey, lacrosse, basketball, or even track.
Joining a crew team almost always guarantees you a varsity spot.
Crew Member: Crew is so much tougher than football, I bet the football team couldn't even finish a crew race.
Football Player: 11 football players would beat 11 crew members in a fight, even at the least competitive football schools.
Crew Member: No way! Crew members are way stronger than football players!
Football Player: I bench 225, and you bench 95.
Crew Member: I only have strong muscles needed for crew.
Football Player: Hows your Squat?
Crew Member: Like 140, but thats not important.
Football Player: Deadlift?
Crew Member: 65, but its not important.
Football Player: Hang Clean?
Crew Member: 45, but it doesn't matter.
Football Player: Apparently crew members only have strength on a crew boat...
Crew Member: Damn Right! We're all super strong!
Football Player: ...
Wrestler: Could you please leave our lunch table? No one here actually likes you...
5👍 84👎
a boy who is tall, dark hair, thinks hes good looking, but in reality he is just a player and a idiot who treats girls like shit
Crew would sleep with anything that walks
4👍 42👎
A fag sport where you just move your arms back and forth.
I go to a fag school. I like to row crew
3👍 73👎
crew will wreck your life.
The initiation of a rower's journey begins when they set hands on a boat. You will carry a boat with others like you, and become astounded at how heavy this thing really is.
When all the oars are in, you may row arms only. Seems easy. then the back is added, then the legs. It seems okay. Only as the weeks go by do you realize the enormity of what you have gotten yourself into.
Your hands will bleed and ache and sting; it hurts to pick up a pencil sometimes. You are introduced to the ergometer, erg, or rowing machine- this machine is the finest example of torture in the modern world. Your hands will hurt worse, you will pull harder, you will vomit in trash cans and wobble on jelly legs to your car.
Finally, the hunger. There is no greater hunger than hunger after practice. You will eat anything and everything in sight.
But aside from the general pain, nausea, and discomfort associated with rowing- it will get you fit. You will meet new people that will change your life. You will work harder than you ever have and see results. You will do things that you have never dreamed of. You will fall in love with crew, only it's a weird kind of love. A certain comfort comes from smelling the boathouse on your clothes, stepping off of the erg and into the rainy outdoors, or crossing the finish line with boats behind you.
Rower: I can't, I have crew.
Non-rower: What's crew?
Rower: Rowing
Non-rower: *kayaking motion* I've been kayaking before!
Rower: I don't think you understand.
Cheerleader: I have practice until 5 today! Ugh!
Rower: *low growl*
Coach: Set up the ergs!
Rowers: I can't I broke my body
Mom: I think I made too much pasta
Rower: there is no such thing as too much pasta
75👍 14👎
A sport which takes up all excess time
I can't hook up with you, I have crew
1265👍 340👎
Crew (krü) n. 1. a sport practiced in rowing boats where the participants willfully awake before dawn and run to practice where they spend one to two hours sitting on a hard wood seat and pull on oars to such a level as to cause their bodies to go into oxygen debt, resulting in the formation of lactic acid in their blood, which causes substantial pain and discomfort in all major muscle groups. This activity is usually performed twice a day in the name of fun, and is conducted under the demonic supervision of a person called "Coach" with the help of his trained servant named "Coxswain".
Me: What are you up to spring break?
Kali: Going to texas with Crew. . .growl.
994👍 304👎