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The process by which the skin under one's eyes becomes more and more purple as the amount of sleep they are deprived of increases.
It must be finals week, my eyes are totally raccoonating.
30👍 16👎
whilst engaging in a sexual act, one of the partners, (normally male) strikes the other partner in both eyes. The two black eyes creates the illusion of the other partner being a raccoon. While the raccon-looking partner is having trouble focusing their vision, you push them towards the door, and knock over the garbage can on their way out of the room.
after I gave her the bucking bronco, I proceeded to execute the raccoon on dat dirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrty slut
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Nefarious little creatures with your worst interests at heart.
*While camping*
Guy 1: Those raccoons shredded our aluminum foil! There wasn't even any food on it! Why would they do that?
Guy 2: Because they are nefarious little creatures with your worst interests at heart.
17👍 9👎
A very cute and deadly animal the hunt in packs and are bulletproof the only way to kill them is to stun them with bullets and finish them off with a sword
Me: "hey have you heard of the raccoon killings"
My friend: "yeah, they are pretty deadly
6👍 3👎
a trashy girl who wears too much make up.
girl 1: Amy is such a raccoon!
girl 2: I know! She belongs on a street corner, she's so trashy!
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Something that is cute or extremely strong, or both. Raccoons are typically not pussies and tend to kill 10 people when they get mad. They are expert boonkgangers and are cutest. #savetheraccoons
U raccoon can u teach me how to not be a fucking pussy
13👍 10👎
Raccoons are nature’s juggernauts. After doing research, I found a list of some of the best traits about them from a trustworthy researcher called “reccooneggs”, which is his birth name. (though they have many more special traits)
Reason 1: He protec but he also attac
Reason 2:They naturally regenerate limbs. Need to whip up a quick dinner? Just chop off a raccoons leg.
Reason 3: They’re obedient. Want someone dead? A raccoon will kill them James Bond style no questions asked.
Reason 4: Racoon Urine cures cancer
Reason 5: Theyre really good at video games. Are you a copper IV in rainbow six siege? They’ll carry you all they way up to diamond.
Reason 6: Need protection against someone with a gun? Raccoons are naturally bulletproof.
Reason 7: Raccoons can DESTROY any animal in a 1v1.
Reason 8: People see you walking a dog? They ignore you. People see you walking a raccoon? Looks like you just got a get-out-of-virgin-free card.
Reason 9: Raccoon feces cure hepatitis.
Reason 10: Just look at them, they’re adorable.
Dude I almost got killed yesterday. Thankfully I had my pet raccoon Ralph to save me from the shooter so my raccoon could lunge onto him and kill him!
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