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That special time of year when parents make up for being too broke to exchange gifts after buying presents for their kids by buying big ticket items with their tax return.
So bill what did your wife get you for Christmas?
Nothing yet, but at Tax-mas I'm getting that new big screen TV.
When you get back from trick or treating on Halloween and your parents inspect your stash and steal the good shit.
Me: I got full sized candy bars from the smith residence.
Friend: Oh shit, for real
Me: yea but when I got home I lost them due to the parent tax.
Any alcohol left at a house after a party. Now belongs to whoever lives in that house.
Person 1: "Hey man, I think I left some beers(alcohol) at your place last night, can I come grab them?"
Person 2: "Fuck no man. That's ours now"
Person 1: "What, why?"
Person 2: "Beer tax, mate."
Tard Tax: An official tax on "retards". A retard shall defined as A) a person who acts retarded and jackass like. B) a person lacking logical and critical thinking to come to a logical conclusion. C) One who lacks the ability to examine ALL the facts in front of them and realise they have been lied to.
Self explanatory....The more of a tard a person is the more tax shall be imposed on them.
1) "Hey guess what??...Congress thinks the American people are not awake and may impose a tard tax on them".
2) "Ladies and gentlemen of the Senate and House...since the American people are asleep and we can basically rape and plunder, how much of a tard tax shall we impose on the American people??"
Extra money you have to spend to fix, replace, upgrade etc. because of a pet's destructive teeth
Teeth tax is commonly needed when owners have a dog that rips up its toys and you have to get the kind of toys that aren't easily destroyed, the extra money needed for these "high quality" toys, is Teeth tax
Another reason you'd need to pay teeth tax is when a pet chews up a personal belonging and it needs to be replaced
"Dang it! My ferret chewed up his hammock last night, and I'm not in the mood to pay teeth tax to get a new one!"
Verb: Spending an entire tax refund on marijuana.
"Chris, come over for a smoke sesh, I just got my tax reeferund, and rolled the biggest blunt.
The charge you’re hit with when you request to remove all animal products from a dish and replace it with veggies, even though you’ve removed the most expensive items in the dish.
Nah, man, I would rather go to a different restaurant, because last time I ate there and asked for peppers instead of chicken and cheese, they hit me with that vegan tax.