Fuck a monkey

1. An exclamation of frustration
2. An exclamation of awesomeness
3. A dismissal
4. To totally suck at something
5. Something you say when there's nothing else to say
6. To have sexual intercourse with a primate

1. "Why won't this thing work??? Argh, fuck a monkey!"
2. "How 'bout that GWAR concert last night?" "Fuck a monkey, that was awesome!"
3. Dumbass walking in on conversation: "You like GWAR??? You guys are sickos!" Guys: "Oh, go fuck a monkey!"
4. *Awkward silence* "Fuck a monkey!"
5. "Man, I fuck a monkey at this!"
6. "I gotta go to the zoo and fuck a monkey."

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fuck a monkey

1. A general exclamation of frusration.
2. An angry dismissal.

1. "This computer won't work! argh, fuck a monkey!!!
2. Guy 1: "god, your such a dumbass," Guy 2: "Oh, fuck a monkey!"

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Fucked a monkey

1. a) To do something inadvertently that causes catastrophic events. b) To unknowingly create an epidemic.

Guy 1: "Dude some girl puked in the fryer at my Mcjob today"

Guy 2: "Damn she really fucked a monkey"

Guy 1: "No kidding, no one got fries for the rest of the day"

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Jesus fucked a monkey!

Phrase used when a pub door swings back and nearly dislodges the pyramid of glasses being carried back to table, or when a twat cyclist speeds through a red light at a pedestrian crossing and almost kills you, or practically anytime 'fuckin hell', 'you fuckin twat', or 'shiiiiiiit' simply doesn't cut the mustard.
Used sparingly, it's effective, offensive and infectious.

Jesus fucked a monkey!, watch out twat.

fuck my monkey

1. Yet another exclaimation of extreme disappointment. Usually uttered after a disheartending discovery.

2. Used in place of "I'll be!", or "you are kidding me".

"You dumped a bowl of icecream on the carpet?? Aw, fuck my monkey!"

"Well, fucky my monkey.... I just saw my cousin on TV!"

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Monkey Fucking

Adjective used to refer to a person usually male who will have sex with any woman. Someone who is so indiscriminate that they would fuck a female monkey. Eventually its use was broadened so that it became used to describe anyone whose habits are unpleasant, unsavoury or just plain weird.

"Malcolm, you are, without doubt, the most useless cunt eyed, shit-licking, monkey fucking, piss-brained, ass kissing, fuck witted WOSP in the world!"

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Monkey Fuck

when a cigarette is lit from another cigarette by putting the lit cigarette to the non-lit one and inhaling the non-lit cigarette

dude 1: can't find my lighter dude. can I monkey fuck your cig?

dude 2: go ahead

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