Mathematical Butterfly

When a math educator has emerged from their cocoon to be at zero mercy of a controlling or demanding boss, or of an oft-stifling educational system, to take charge of what they want to do in math or math education in spite of the risks and uncertainties before them.

For the large majority of teachers and tutors, procrastination or the fear of failure has prevented them from becoming the mathematical butterfly God has destined them to be.

19👍 39👎

Fart Mathematics

The mathematics behind farting. They can determine the stink, sound, feel, and even the exact amount of particles in the fart (farticles) that you let out.

I had to use my Fart Mathematics to figure out how many farticles my farts blast out.

32👍 7👎

Discreet mathematics

Discreet mathematics refers to the subtle study of mathematics. Discreet mathematics is characterised by furtive looks in maths textbooks disguised as pr0n and by secret maths lectures held in abandoned warehouses at midnight.

The origins of discreet mathematics can be traced to the 19th century, where young women interested in the mathematical and scientific subjects were unable to openly pursue such studies. Instead, they disguised their math textbooks as lifestyle magazines, and talked about mathematics in a secret code, called Polari.

This became unnecessary due to the total abolition of any form of sexism at all in 1964 by the Ghost of President Kennedy.

Discreet mathematics > pr0n

79👍 25👎

Everyday Mathematics

An exotic form of torture created by McGraw Hill. This system of math learning generally involves learning skills such as: typing numbers onto a calculator, realizing HomeLinks (Homework Pages) have answer keys on them, and most importantly helps your child feel like they understand what they are learning, possibly due to the fact that is because the course teaches one concept over 5 years. Generally when students move on to Algebra, they begin to realize the meaning of Everyday Mathematics. Useless crap.

See algebra. Student: Did you understand how to do the HomeLinks last night?
StudentB: No, I just looked at the key.
Student: Wh...at?! But I was looking in the Everyday Mathematics SRI that she tells us to use!
StudentB: You're an idiot.

9👍 1👎

Mathematic’s books

The best (mis)use of an apostrophe spotted outside a city bookstore in mainland China.

An English tourist (who is a linguist professor back home) was reported to have experienced a seconds-long stroke on seeing the “Mathematic’s books” classification, and the cashier on seeing her customer’s dizziness immediately jumped to her rescue.

3👍 16👎

Mathematical Graffiti

An artist’s lawbreaking pastime, whereby they irreverently paint math-related drawings, formulas, or symbols in forbidden areas or public squares without getting caught by the authorities—the artistic equivalent of a couple illicitly indulging in a quickie with zero public knowledge or suspicion.

Few illegal activities give the mathematical graffiti artist more thrill when working in a pressurized environment, compared to taking part in an annual pressure-free graffiti carnival approved by the authorities.

29👍 54👎

Mathematical Pointillism

The use of small dots rather than a pen, pencil, or Sharpie marker to depict a numeral, geometric figure, formula, or math concept.

Even artists who are allergic to school math could demonstrate their numerical, geometric, or formulaic creativity through mathematical pointillism.

20👍 34👎