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The sexual act in which a man puts 2 eggs in between a woman's breasts(while laying in bed) and then sit on them for a solid 2 - 5 hours with a heating lamp near by and the room temperature very high. Then when he gets up, they should be hot, goey, and sticky. He will then proceed to use this as lube for violent sex afterwards. Then, with some of the eggshells, he will proceed to scrape her nipples until they are a bloody pulp.
Me: Dude, im so nervous...
Friend: Whys that?
Me: Sally wants me to do a Texas Humpty-Dumpty Nipple Splitter....I don't think I can sit still for that long!
Friend: Don't worry you'll be fine bro!!
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The phrase referred to Donald is specific and in general, someone who's too conceited to see he/she is/will be the cause of his/her own downfall.
Humpty Trumpty Dumpty's unaware rotten do smell.
Meeting with Russia officials, he gave classified intel.
Trumpty said he can share classified information.
Trumpty’s clueless he’s tearing down our nation.
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DUMPTY HUMPTY BUMPTY RUMPTY AAAa
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DUMPTY HUMPTY BUMPTY RUMPTY AAAa
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DUMPTY HUMPTY BUMPTY RUMPTY AAAa
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This wonderful event starts out with a man sitting on a wall to show off his crotch to a woman he has a crush on. To show the woman that he is mating material, he will hump the wall in hopes of moistening her lady garden. However, he does not realize that humping the hard wall will stimulate his spinky and cause a great fall... of shit. The poopy will land below on the woman, and all hopes of mating will be crushed.
Tyrant: Yo boss, happy Friday. Any fun plans for the weekend?
The Boss: Yea I was gonna go to the Meat Market tonight for some juicy Italian sausage, but I accidentally Humpty-Dumptied my wife last night and I gotta make it up to her.
Tyrant: Bro... you’re gonna have to explain this one.
The Boss: Okay.. so I hopped on our little wall between our living room and kitchen and figured I would try to turn her on. Turns out.. I only turned on my shit wagon and inadvertently plopped a log right on her dome. Safe to say I won’t be getting dome for a while.
Tyrant: Damn dude I’m so sorry to hear that. Hope she doesn’t get POO-TSD from that. Next time wear your Shitbit, as it would’ve warned you that logs were a brewin’.
A relatively young term, emerging from the slang terms for Wednesday (hump day) and the act of discarding one's partner. Thus, Humpty Dumpty can be defined as a breakup on a Wednesday.
bitch: Hey girl, how's you and Mark?
hoe: Well... Humpty Dumpty.
bitch: Oh nooo then we have to get you laid this weekend