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provider beard

Facial hair worn by pussified, emasculated cucks who have sacrificed their testicles, wallets and pride to domineering female spouses or significant others in exchange for sex and social acceptance.

Similar in look to the ever popular dad beard, men who sport a provider beard often have one or more of the following traits: a side-parted preppy hairstyle, SJW approved eyeglasses (for the visually impaired) J. Crew polo shirts, Nantucket shorts, Sperry Top-Siders and an aura of feigned happiness.

Hey, who is the bearded guy driving the soccer mom SUV? Oh, that’s just your cousin. His provider beard is all that remains of his manhood after his wife made him have a vasectomy.

by DJtadd May 21, 2021


Beard gang

Beard gang refers to a social class of men with facial hair

He's so attractive, a beard gang, a man with style.

by Nwabuokei July 22, 2018


Bearded Men

Men with bears who are either really sexy, or likes other men. Goes by the name Dalton and kisses dudes is the locker room.

Bearded Men are just like Lil Nas X.

by that,dude,who,is,lightskin March 09, 2022


beard blind

the inability to see or recall if a man or woman has facial hair, including if it changes over time. not to be confused with beard blinders; the use of one's hands to part excessive facial or other hair. Ex "his beard was so copious she had to use beard blinders to kiss him

Beard blind in the witness made the garden gnome bank robbers hard to finger

by odiepeyote February 26, 2017


beard shmear

The act of eating a girl out and she queefs out vaginal discharge (possibly solidified) and you proceed to dry off her vagina with your beard.

"What's that smell?"

"Last night I beard shmeared this fat bitch and I haven't washed it yet....I can taste it.."

by Fat Susie February 14, 2014


Kevins-Beard

The scruffy, full-bodied beard that grows on the face of only the manliest of men. Not everybody can properly grow a Kevins-Beard, but those who can certainly enjoy an upper-echelon in the beard hierarchy.

Often associated with terms like 'masculinity', 'male', and 'strength'.

Urban legends commonly hold true that the source of their true knowledge and strength come from their Kevins-Beard.

Example 1:
Person 1: "Man, look at that beard!"
Person 2: "That's not just a beard, it's a Kevins-Beard"

Example 2:
I was thinking of growing a Kevins-Beard, only if I possess the masculinity, testosterone, and full-bodied confidence to do so.

by Maverick0003 November 22, 2013


The Bearded One

Karl Marx.

In truth, since I have been under the influence of The Bearded One since I began studying economics.

by AttillathePun February 10, 2019