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Prussian masturbation

Jerking off and listening to prussia's gloria att the same time

"Last night I did a prussian masturbation with my friends"

by Wilhelm April 10, 2020


mentally masturbate

When one is confused and spends more time then necessary mulling over the multitude of variables that come into play when making decisions.
Much like self pleasuring, the vast amount of thoughts that pertain to the situation in which you are trying to make the decision flood or overwhelm your thought process/senses thereby causing you to become consumed with nonsensical thoughts that end up wasting yours and others time.

When Joe finally caught up with the rest of the gang they wondered what had taken him so long,

he replied 'I had to listen to Amy mentally masturbate over which iphone cover to buy'

by Chilcotin Buddha January 7, 2014


Pencil Masturbation

When your mechanical pencil is out of led, so you repeatedly and forcefully push the eraser to make sure that you don't have any extra led in there. The sound it makes is like fapping. When led comes out, it is called pencil ejaculation.

Dude, that guy in class kept performing pencil masturbation. Like, get a new pencil already!

by Liberty5000 February 20, 2019


compulsive masturbation

Addiction to masturbation

I'm having my first compulsive masturbation.

by AstroCatz May 8, 2016


special masturbator

An attorney assigned to an unwinnable case for the sole purpose of delaying confirmation of criminality.

Anyone know of a special masturbator that a corrupt federal judge could engage in United States of America v. D.J. Trump?

by YAWA September 11, 2022


Eye masturbation

When you rub your eye and can't stop

#1:I am bordered, lets itch our eyes and describe what do we see after this weird eye masturbation
#2: heck yeaaa

by I-like-furries February 8, 2022


reverse masturbation

An act which is the inverse of masturbation; namely, when a person has sex with everyone else in the world but themself.

Bystander: “What’s he doing in that bathroom?”

Sexpert: “Could me more than masturbating…possibly reverse masturbation?”
Bystaner: “Noone is safe!”
Sexpert: “Reverse masturbation: it will be end of us all.”

by Triggered To Death June 22, 2020