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blarted on the job

When you're going down on your partner and randomly blow on his or her genitals to make a farting noise

"Lorrie why are you so pissed at Kevin?!"
"He blarted on the job last night; I couldn't even get off"

by Love Me Sexay! February 21, 2015


Paul Blart

Derogatory term referring to mall security staff, and on a larger scale, any security guard that doesn't have the authority to issue arrests or carry firearms (see rent-a-cop).

"Hey Paul Blart! I just pissed in the wishing well! What are you gonna do about it?"
"There's a couple Paul Blarts in the food court telling those kids to calm down, but the kids are telling them to fuck off."

by BfloDrumDude June 20, 2012

38๐Ÿ‘ 11๐Ÿ‘Ž


Fish Blart

When one expells a bloody fish fart. Usually expelled by an obese feminine figure. Fish Blart.

Man that fat fuck just fish blarted all over the wall!

by Blarts Are Sexy. August 17, 2009

8๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Paul Blarted

The act of eating a pixie stick and then kicking some serious ass!

Man 1- Bro what did you do today?
Man 2- I Paul Blarted some bitch!
Man 1- Awesome what flavor?
Man 2- Orange

by That Faggot No One Likes October 4, 2012

4๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


Paul blart

The act of being a fatass working as security in a small mall in New England and being murder from dank faze clan

My brother was Paul blarting then he died

by BlueGrass420 May 13, 2015

13๐Ÿ‘ 4๐Ÿ‘Ž


Paul Blart

A variation on the blumpkin wherein a man performs oral sex on a woman while she is sitting on a toilet taking a shit.

"Why does Roger seem so down today?"
"Well, I guess last night Sheryl asked him to give her a Paul Blart."
"Dude, that's disgusting... did he actually do it?"
"Yeah, he really does love her... I guess afterwards he threw up in the sink. He says he can't get the smell out of his mind... it's haunting him."

by Simplicius April 15, 2009

86๐Ÿ‘ 39๐Ÿ‘Ž


Paul Blart

Originally from southern Ontario. It's when you pop a bar, take a shot and then hit a fat popper.

"Yo Paul Blarts this weekend?"
"I did a Paul Blart last night it was fucked"

by Untitled_07 November 16, 2016

7๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž