Dictaphone

Idiot who's always on his mobile (cell phone).

A: You'll never guess who was blocking the gangway on the Tube this morning.
B: Who?
A: A Dictaphone.

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Dictaphone

Standing in the men's room, using one hand to hold the phone, the other to hold your dick.

Lots of dudes using Dictaphone in there!

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Dictaphone

Is when you are on the phone with your girlfriend or boyfriend ( If you swing that way ) and you slap your dick on the mouthpiece of your mobile phone. This usually makes a loud thumping sound that the other party hears.

Ashley: What is that thumping sound i hear ?
Tim: That is me giving you a dictaphone !
Ashley: Awwwww, Thanks Baby !! I hope you can give me a dictaphone EVERYDAY !!!

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