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land shark

a sexual act where a man and his partner stand at opposite ends of the room. the woman bends over and braces against the wall while the man clasps his hands over his head imitating a shark. He then begins humming the jaws theme song and sprints across the room, lead by his erection, and attempts to penetrate either the vagina or anus with his momentus impact.

I have to be really drunk to try the land shark, but im usually too inebriated to run in a straight line, so i wake up very sore.

by Ian Wetzel September 14, 2004

1511๐Ÿ‘ 713๐Ÿ‘Ž


land shark

A character from the SNL line up of back in the day. He'd knock on the door and say a phrase to convince the party on the other side of the door to answer. For example knock knock

"Knock knock" (actor on other side of door) "Who's there" The landshark then answers, "Pizza man" then the actor on other side of door would open the door and get eaten by the landshark

by Rich August 23, 2004

385๐Ÿ‘ 256๐Ÿ‘Ž


land shark

1.n. An Ultimate term used when, at the end of a game, a male drops his pants, lodges a disc in his butt-crack, and the team carries him around the field cheering "land shark land shark land shark"

2.v. to become a land shark.

1. "No one wanted to lift the land shark above their heads out of fear that his penis would be flogging them all."

2. "I swear, if we win this game, I'm gonna land shark."

by ian November 18, 2004

359๐Ÿ‘ 288๐Ÿ‘Ž


land shark

A land shark is a code used in veterinary medicine that refers to an animal that is vicious and deemed unsafe. This only happens if the animal has gotten lose and bit someone.

The next clients dog is classified as a land shark, so make sure to use a rabies pole, muzzle and safe distant at all times.

by Vet tech August 9, 2012

36๐Ÿ‘ 23๐Ÿ‘Ž


land shark

Semi-derogatory term used to refer to lawyers and other professionals against whom there is little positive public sentiment

Lock the doors, I heard there's a land shark going around looking for late filers.

I should have represented myself....land sharks and their fees took most of my settlement money.

by PiercedPsycho September 14, 2010

52๐Ÿ‘ 68๐Ÿ‘Ž


land shark

The result of being caught on the toilet, taking a shit, when you realize their is no toilet paper. So you leave your seat with your underwear half mast and race to the other bathroom in the house to wipe your ass - dropping small, sticky pieces of shit, that were attached to your cornhole, behind you all over the house - or land sharks.

I was dropping a grogan when the JWs came and knocked on my door. I thought it was the mail guy so I hurried up to wipe, but discovered I was all out of the good stuff. So I made a mad dash to the other bathroom and totally left a land shark in the front hallway.

by smittan September 6, 2011

31๐Ÿ‘ 66๐Ÿ‘Ž


land shark

This is a term that is used when referencing the act of having sex with a woman while she's on her period. Sharks attack women who are menstruating in the ocean, and since you are having sex with a woman's bleeding vagina on the land, it is called 'land sharking'. It can also be called a 'shark attack' and is often accompanied by the Jaws theme song and a hand smacking motion immitating the clamping of sharks' jaws.

This should only be attempted if...
A) one is extremely horny
B) one is extremely commited
C) one is both extremely horny and extremely commited

Latisha's on her period, but I'm so damn horny. I think I might land shark her anyway.

by LindseyLu May 12, 2006

28๐Ÿ‘ 63๐Ÿ‘Ž